


Breakage

by orphan_account



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: 5 Seconds of Summer - Freeform, Angry Luke, Angry Michael, Anorexia, Ashton Irwin - Freeform, Asylum, BDSM, Bottom Michael, Calum Hood - Freeform, Depressed Michael, Depression, Dom Luke, Dom/sub, Hurt Luke, Light Dom/sub, Luke Hemmings - Freeform, M/M, Michael Clifford - Freeform, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Ashton, Punk Ashton, Sad Ashton, Sad Calum, Scars, Self-Harm, Shy Luke, Sub Michael, Suicidal Ashton, Suicidal Michael, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Top Luke, Writer Ashton, suicidal Calum
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-14
Updated: 2015-06-17
Packaged: 2018-03-12 21:55:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 20,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3356693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What happened to him?"<br/>"He's crazy, Luke. Really, we all are. Some are just crazier than the rest."</p><p> </p><p>OR- the one where Luke ends up in an asylum and Michael just happens to be the most damaged one there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Luke Hemmings did not want to be here. He wasn't crazy, dammit! He didn't need this. All he'd done was try to electrocute himself, merely by "accident". He wanted to go home. He didn't need to be at this damned asylum, or, as the doctor called it, "A Home for Mentally Ill Youth". He just wanted to go home. He wrapped his long, skinny arms around himself and put on his most outraged expression, trying to tell everyone that he saw, "hey, I hate you."

He was greeted by a loud, scared gasp, followed by shoes squeaking on linoleum as he pushed through the doors.

_What the hell?_

He looked around, spotting a tall, preternaturally skinny boy with acid green hair clutching the shoulders of a shorter boy with curly hair. Luke could hear the boy whispering quietly, soothingly, and stroking his friend's colored hair.

"Shh, shh, it's alright," Luke heard before looking away. He marched up to the desk in the center of the room and slammed his papers down loudly, causing a shriek of fear to escape from the mouth of the boy behind him. This was a fucking insane asylum, definitely. Luke really didn't want to be here. He wasn't fucked up, he wasn't like that kid behind him. He deserved to go home. A secretary reached up and claimed his papers from the ledge. 

"Oh, Mr. Hemmings, welcome," she said in a grandmotherly voice that made him want to hate her. "You'll be staying in teen psych. I can have..." she glanced over his shoulder at the two boys who were behind him, "Ashton show you up."

The curly haired boy- Ashton, Luke assumed- looked up at the sound of his name, still holding on to his dyed-haired friend. 

"Oh, no," he protested, wrapping an arm even tighter around the boy's waist. "What about Michael?"

The secretary looked at 'Michael' as if she hadn't even noticed he was there. "You can take him up with you, right?" 

Ashton shook his head, brown curls flying everywher. "He won't go anywhere like this."

The woman frowned at Ashton for a moment before turning back to Luke. "I'll call someone down to get you."

 

A few minutes later, a blonde boy scurried into the hallway. He cast a worried glance at Michael and whispered to Ashton, who brushed him away. Luke noticed that the blonde walked with a slight limp, lilting to his left as he moved.

"What'd ya need?" he cheerily asked the secretary, the faintest hints of an Irish accent in his voice. The lady behind the desk smiled warmly at him and nods him in Luke's direction.

"Why, hullo there," the guy said, holding a hand out to Luke. Luke just stared at him, trying to figure out why he might be here. The Irishman looked so normal, so unlike the Michael kid who was still trembling in Ashton's arms. The blonde' face fell slightly at Luke's reaction to him as he pulled his hand back. 

"'M Niall," he muttered, "c'mon." And with that, he started towards the stairwell which he had come out of, not even looking back to see if Luke was following him. Great. Luke'd been here for 10 minutes and he'd already pissed someone off.

"I'm Luke," he mumbled after a few minutes of awkward silence. Niall turned back to him, casting him a small crooked smile.

"This is the floor," he announced "5B. Halfway between the top and bottom floors, like purgatory, if you will."

Luke simply stared at Niall. The blonde seemed so normal. Why was he here? It seemed like there should be some unspoken rule about not asking about other people's issues, so he held his tongue. He'd be willing to hear if Niall was willing to tell him.

Apparently, Luke had been standing in the doorway of floor 5B for quite some time, and Niall was looking at him funny. He snapped out of his stupor when someone nudged his back gently and giggled, trying to get him to move out of the way.

"Are you gonna, like, move?" the boy from downstairs- Ashton- asks. Luke steps from the doorway, blushing like mad as Ashton steps past him, his dyed-haired friend- Michael- clinging to his side. "I'm Ashton, by the way."

"Luke," he replies.

"Oh, and this boy right here is Michael. Say hi, Mike," Ash whispers encouragingly. Michael just stares Luke up and down, examining him. After a few minutes, their eyes meet, and Michael mouths something indecipherable before tugging Ashton down the hallway.

It takes Luke a few minutes to realize what the green haired boy had said.

"Welcome to hell."

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Luke, you tried to kill yourself."  
> "I did not try to kill myself! And, even if I did, why does it matter?"

Luke was sitting in the chair of the shrink's private office, watching anxiously as the man looked over his files. His leg was jiggling wildly and he tried to still it, because surely it was just making him look more pshycotic than he actually was. 

"Well, Luke," the shrink said, closing the folder. Luke waited for the words that would either condemn or free him. "Your case isn't as severe as some of the other kids here-" _Michael_ , Luke thought- "but it still isn't something to be taken lightly. You'll be here for around a month, is my guess.

What the  _fuck?!_ A month? No, Luke couldn't stay here for a month. He didn't have to.

"No," he spat, "that's fucking crazy. I don't need to be here for a month. Hell, I don't even need to be here for a day! I'm not a fuckup, okay? I just wanna go home."

The doctor smiled sympathetically at Luke and Luke glared in return. 

"Luke," he said in a gentle voice, "you tried to kill yourself. You need to be here, you need to heal."

Luke burst out of his chair, swinging his arms in exasperation. "I did not try to kill myself!" he screeches. "And, even if I did, what does it matter?"

The psychologist raises his hands, trying to calm Luke. Luke takes in a few breaths and sit again, certain that he just fucked himself with his outburst.

"I don't suppose that you can explain to me how a running blowdryer fell into the bath whilst you were in it, can you?" the shrink asks. Shit. Luke's hands are tied there. That  _does_ sound a lot like suicide. 

"Nope," he mumbles, shaking his head. His perfectly styled quiff sways on the top of his head because its just too damn tall not to, and he goes to bite at his lip ring before realizing that it's not there. Oh yeah. They'd taking from him when he's first gotten here. The shrink decides to keep talking.

"But who knows? Maybe you're right. Maybe it was all just a freak accident and you can go home soon. But, until then, you'll be going to group therapy with the rest of the teens and you'll check in with me about twice a week, okay? Is that okay, Luke?" Luke nods stiffly and stands, turning towards the door, throwing a 'thank you' over his shoulder as he leaves.

The hallway in teen pshych is drearily quite, everyone else likely tucked away in their rooms. Being new, Luke had his own room, but that sucked for him because he hated being alone, and he hated the dark, and he hated being alone in the dark. As he turned the corner to the dorms, he saw Michael sitting on the floor, legs splayed in a V, his elbows resting on the floor between them. Without thinking, Luke was walking over to him. 

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked. Michael just stared at Luke's approaching figure and sat up, leaning back against the wall. Luke was now less than a meter away and he sank down the wall next to Michael.

"You're Michael, right?" Luke asked, even though he already knew the answer. He just wanted the boy to say something. But Michael continued to stare, studying Luke's face, looking at his hair, his eyes, the hole where his peirecing used to be.

Luke held out his hand to the other boy. "I'm Luke," he said softly. He knew that Michael definitely would not shake his hand, but he was hoping for some kind of response. Then, so quickly that no one would notice if they weren't looking, Michael's lips moved.

"Luke," he mouthed, his word seeming to be nothing more than a tremble of his lips. But Luke caught it and smiled warmly at Mike. 

"Yeah," he cooed, encouraging the skinny boy. Whoa. Who the hell was he? He didn't even want to be in this damned place, but here he was, making friends? But there was just something about Michael, something sweet and innocent that made Luke want to protect him. He jumped as Niall came bounding around the corner.

"Oi, Luke, there y'are!" the blonde boy exclaimed. He loped over to where Luke was sitting with Michael. "Hey, Mikey, how ya doin?" Michael, of course, stared at him with wide eyes, but mouthed his name slowly, aknowleding him. Niall smiled.

"We should get ya back to Ash, yeah? He's looking for you," Niall said quietly, his voice unusually soft. He reached forward and gently, tentatively wrapped his fingers around Michael's bicep, pulling the boy slowly to his feet. But Michael shook his head and pulled out of Niall's grip, turning and walking down the hall before disappearing into what must be his room. Niall shakes his head and watches Michael go.

"D'you wanna go back to mine?" the Irish boy offers a few minutes later. Luke nods sleepily and stands, following Niall through the halls and to his dorm. 

"So, I'm assuming you wanna know our stories, yeah?" Niall says as soon as he's closed the door. He then walks over to his bed and sits on it, patting the spot next to him. Luke nods and sits down. 

"Well, there are a lot of us here, but I'll only tell you about the important people; my friends. Me first," Niall starts, flexing his arms behind his head. "My parents put me in here because they think I'm schizophrenic. It's because I had an imaginary friend when I was younger, I guess. Her name was Sofie, but she was- she was real, Luke, and I loved her. I also made matters worse when I threw myself in front of a car to save her, I guess.

"Next, we have Ashton. He was suicidal, he cut himself. He'll show you the scars if you ask him, but he prefers to keep them covered.

"Then we have Harry. He's an anorexic, but he's recovering. Gained two pounds in the past two weeks. I'm proud of him.

"And, finally, there's Michael. He showed up almost 8 months ago, been here ever since. Poor kid's got PTSD, anxiety, depression, he's anorexic, bulimic, and pretty much entirely mute. He's mute by choice, though. And he showed up after his best friend- Calum, I think- committed suicide. Mikey tried to hang himself. And he's not recovering. He loses weight like I lose guitar picks, and he has at least one panic attack each week. And it's like he's given up. He knows things, he has the tools to be okay, but he just doesn't even try to use them."

Luke hears Niall's voice crack on the last sentence, looking over to see that he's crying. In an act completely suprising to himself, Luke reaches over and wraps his arms around Niall, holding the smaller boy's shaking figure to his chest.

"What about you?" Niall chokes out, and now Luke knows that it's his turn to share. He winces

"Apparently, I tried to kill myself," he mutters, "and I don't know why, but I did. They said that I tried to electricute myself by dropping a blow dryer into the bath, and maybe I did, but I- just- I don't know, Niall. I really don't know."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this on my mobile so pardon any mistakes please


	3. Chapter 3

Luke walked into group therapy with Niall the next day. They seemed to be the last people to get there. Ashton waved at Niall, gesturing for them to join him and Michael.

"Oi, Ash, how ya been?" Niall asks, sitting cross-legged on the floor next to him. Luke sat by Michael, who looked up in aknowledgment before tipping his head back down to the floor.

About 5 minutes after Luke and Niall had showed up, a shrink walked into the therapy room. He was holding a box of who knows what, and Luke tried to focus on him. He was doing a good job until he felt a skinny arm loop around his waist.

Luke sat up straighter and looked to his side, where Michael had wrapped an arm around him and was pressing into him. This was unexpected. He slipped his own arm around Michael's shoulders, not entirely sure what he should do. Michael put his face in Luke's neck, exhaling cool air over his skin. The therapist was still talking.

Eventually the shrink opened the box. It was filled with spiral bound notebooks with white covers, and Luke wondered what the hell they were for. As the man handed them out, he explained.

"All right, everyone. So, for the next little while we will be journaling. For those who don't know, that's when you right your feelings down, and it makes them easier to get over. I want you to name your notebooks, okay? And you can't decorate them as well, if you want to. Then you can write whatever you want in them, no one will judge you."

The shrink dropped 4 notebooks in front of Luke, Mike, Ashton, and Niall, along with 4 Sharpies and 4 pens. Michael pulled away from Luke and immediately grabbed his, uncapping a Sharpie and starting to draw on the cover.

Luke had no idea what to write in his damn notebook. He decided to name it after his mum, scrawling 'Liz' loosely across the cover. But when it came to actually writing something, he drew a blank. And then he started to write about what happened the other day, scribbling down sentences about Niall, about Mike and Ash, about how he'd be here for a month.

Out of the corner of his eye, Luke could see Michael writing away. He  didn't read any of what Mike had written, he wasn't an ass, but he studied the boy's script. Michael wrote in perfect cursive, the words small and neat and pretty. The green-haired boy furrowed his brows and bit his lip in concentration, and Luke could see tears pooling in his eyes. Out of nowhere, Michael tipped his head back and screamed. 

Everyone in the room collectively shit themselves, Luke jerking back as Ashton wrapped his arms around Michael, flipping his book shut with the cover to the floor. 

"Hey, hey," Ash murmured, running his fingers through Michael's hair, rocking the pale boy slightly in his arms. "It's okay, Mikey. You're okay." Ashton then stood, all but lifting Michael up with him, and grabbed their two notebooks up off the floor before leading Michael out the door. 

When Ashton picked up Michael's notebook, Luke saw a perfectly drawn C on the cover. Calum. Michael had named his book Calum, Luke was sure. Niall stared at the door with furrowed brows long after Mike and Ash had left, and Luke scooted over beside him.

"Calum," Luke whispered. "His book was named Calum."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the best chapter but I needed it as filler for the next one :/


	4. Chapter 4

Michael returned to teen pshych 3 days later, showered and clean-shaven and utterly dazed. Ashton had immediately ran to hug him, almost lifting the skinny boy in his excitement. Michael had wrapped his hands around Ashton's bicep but made no move to acknowledge him, staring straight ahead as Ashton spoke.

"Oi, Mikey, what'cha been doin?" Niall asked, cupping Michael's shoulder. Michael looked at him for a few seconds, as if trying to remember who he was. Niall released the other boy when a nursing assistant walked up, clasping Michael's elbow and leading him down the hallway.

"He's alright," she explained to the boys, "he just needs to rest for a while."

"What the fuck was that?" Luke asked after she was out of earshot. Ashton frowned at him for a second.

"Don't swear," he reprimanded, before asking, "you really don't know how this place works, do you?" Luke shook his head.

"Back to yours?" Ashton asked. Luke nodded, leading Ashton through the hallways to his room. 

"So what even happened?" Luke asked as he sat down on his bed. Ashton sat beside him, a little closer than necessary, but that's just how people were here.

"So, in this place there's a child pshych floor, an adolescent pshych floor, teen physch, young adult pshych and a few lab floors. The first floor is the emergency floor. It's where you go if you're having a massive pshycotic breakdown. So that's where I took Michael.

"Let me tell you, he was freaking out. Screaming and shaking the entire way down. They couldn't treat him if he was like that, so they had to sedate him. And the sedative they use is, oh, holy shit, it's one hell of a powerful drug. He's probably still getting over that. Also, they had to adjust his meds, so he's definitely feeling that. He'll be a little crazy for the next little while." Ashton sounded pained as he said that, as Michael was his best friend. Luke put a hand on his knee.

"What's, umm, what's your story?" he asked tentatively. Ashton frowned at him weakly.

"I'm sure Niall's told you already," he said. Luke nodded, feeling like an idiot.

"But anyway, I was suicidal," Ashton says, "almost killed myself, ended up here. After my brother died everything just kinda went downhill for me. Life fucking sucked. I used to cut myself, as well. I jumped from my apartment building 6 months ago, and I've been here ever since. I'd been in and out of this place for the past year, though."

"Can- can I…" Luke stuttered.

"The scars?" Ashton guessed. "Sure." He reached down and slid his sleeves up, revealing the badly mangled skin of his wrists. Luke let out a quiet gasp and squeezed Ashton's knee.

"I'm so sorry," he murmured, leaning in closer and putting his face in Ashton's neck. Ash tensed briefly before relaxing into Luke, and Luke felt his chest heave in a sob.

"There's nothing you can do about it now," Ash mumbled through his tears, now clinging to Luke for dear life. Luke wrapped both arms around Ashton's smaller frame, holding him close.

"But I'm still sorry."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a little insight on Ashton and his life! Sorry it was such a short chapter I'm sick.


	5. Chapter 5

Luke had been in teen pshych for almost a week and not once had Michael eaten with them. Luke looked around the little table that he was sitting at as he turned a spoon in his oatmeal. Niall was splitting a breakfast sandwich with Harry, as Harry didn't want a full one, and Ash was peeling an orange and smiling down at the tray in front of him.

"Oi, why're you so happy, mate?" Niall asked. Ashton looked up, still smiling brightly, and giggled. Honest to God, the kid giggled. Luke hadn't been expecting that.

"What?" Ash challenged, "am I not allowed to smile?" He was still giggling slightly, bright and happy and infectious. Everyone at the table was smiling.

"Seriously, bro, what's going on?" Harry asked, taking a sip from Niall's water bottle.

"Well..." Ashton started, "okay, so, nothing's official yet, but they said I could be clear to go soon." Niall perked up, leaning forward over the table.

"Soon? Like, how soon?"

"Like, two days."

"Oh my god, man! That's great! Say hi to your family for me!" Niall chirped. But then he sat back, his face falling ever so slightly. "But what about Michael?"

Ashton frowned and bit his lip. "Yeah, I don't know. I was thinking, umm, Luke?"

"What?" Luke asked, turning to Ashton.

"Umm, would you be down for, like, checking over Mikey when I leave?"

Luke frowned for a second, not understanding what Ashton meant. "What?"

"Ahh, you don't understand, do you?" Luke shook his head. "Well, they only have a certain number of staff on each floor," Ashton explained, "so, for kids like Mikey, they ask other people on the floor to, kinda, like, take care of them. Not really like that, but, like, just watch over them. I was asked to stay with Michael."

Luke nodded in understanding. "So you want me to take your place when you leave?" Ash smiled. "What's even wrong with him, though? How did he get... like that?"

Luke looked back and forth from Ashton to Niall. The blonde shrugged. 

"I dunno, mate. Ash is the only one who knows his whole story." Niall said. He peeled a banana and split it in half, offering half to Harry. Luke turned back to Ashton.

"Back to mine?" he offered, already standing and lifting his tray from the table. Ashton nodded and followed him, throwing his crumpled napkin in the trash as they left. Once they were both seated in Luke's room with the door shut and locked, Luke started asking questions.

"So, what's Michael's story?" he questioned as he sat on the bed next to Ashton. Ash sighed.

"Well, he was originally an anorexic. That was it. He went to a support group for it and he met this kid, Calum Hood. The doctors don't know for sure if there was something more to their relationship than just being best friends, but they suspect that the two of them were lovers. Again, not sure. Don't call me on it. But then Calum died. He killed himself, and Michael went crazy. He stopped sleeping, starved himself, freaked out about everything. And there was nothing that anyone could do about it. About two weeks after Calum died, he tried to hang himself from his ceiling fan. The rope that he used wasn't thick enough, so it snapped and he ended up here." Ashton's voice was thick as he recounted Michael's story, and Luke wrapped an arm over his shoulders.

"How do you know all this?" he asked. Ashton took in a shaky breath and pulled away from Luke, turning to face him.

"The doctors gave me access to his files when I started taking care of him. Just so I knew what was going on in his head."

"But you don't, really, do you?"

"I don't even think Michael knows what's going on in his head."


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long! Writers block. Would you guys mind if I made a chapter really smutty? Please comment.

Luke sat on Michael's bed, the two of them watching as Ashton packed up the last of his few things. Luke's bags were already in the room, as he'd be moving in with Michael after Ashton left. Michael gripped Luke's hand tightly between both of his own, squeezing until his knuckles were white, tears brimming in his green eyes as he watched his best friend preparing to leave. Luke gave his hands a reassuring squeeze and murmured softly under his breath. That was a trick that Ashton had taught him, telling him that Michael liked noise, but not loud noise. He also loved music, but none of them were allowed to have electronics. Ashton had admitted, rather embarrassed, that he sang for Michael quite often.

"Luke?" Ashton asked, pulling Luke out of his thoughts. "Can you help me with this?" Ash gestured with his head towards his overstuffed bag, which he was trying unsuccessfully to zip. Luke nodded and stood, gently pulling his hand away from Michael and reaching around Ashton to lean on his suitcase. With Luke's weight holding it down, Ash was able to close his bag. 

"Ash?" Luke said.

"Yeah?" 

"I'm gonna miss you, man."

Ashton smiled widely, but Luke saw something else flash in his eyes, something he couldn't name. Ashton reached forward, wrapping his arms tightly around Luke's stomach.

"I'm gonna miss you too, Luke," he said into the larger boy's shoulder. Luke squeezed him back.

"Is there any way that I could reach you? Like a phone number or something?" Ashton was shaking his head before Luke even finished his question.

"No, Luke. You'll find me if you need me," he replied. Luke pulled back and frowned at him.

"But-" 

"Just no, Luke," Ashton said, voice gentle but firm. He then released Luke and turned to Michael, who was still seated on his bed, absently wringing his hands. 

"Mikey," Ashton murmured, opening his arms wide. Michael stood and immediately buried himself against Ashton's chest. Ash rocked slowly back and forth.

"Mikey," he whispered into the thin boy's green hair. Michael pulled back slightly and rested his hands against the sides of Ashton's neck, staring straight into his eyes.

"I love you," he mouthed. Ashton smiled widely at Michael and pulled him close again.

"I love you too, Mikey. So much. Don't you dare forget me," he said. Michael shook his head, his shoulders heaving as he cried. Ashton cooed and pulled Michael even tighter.

"I love you," he repeated before pulling away. Tear tracks stained Michael's cheeks and his eyes were red and glassy. 

"Aww, don't cry, Michael," Ashton said. Michael nodded and raised his hands to his face, rubbing at his eyes. He then looked back at Ashton.

"Bye, Ashton," he mouthed. 

"Bye, Mikey."

Ashton turned back around, gripping the handle of his bag with one hand and clasping Luke's shoulder with the other. 

"Take care of him, okay?" he asked. Luke nodded.

"Bye, Luke."

"Bye, Ashton."

Ash turned back one more time before leaving the room.

"Goodbye."

 

Michael curled up in his bed, wrapping his arms around his knees and resting his head on them. Luke sat next to him, draping and arm over his shaking shoulders.

"Mikey? Are you okay?" Michael nodded in response, leaning slightly into Luke. Luke held him tighter.

"It'll be alright."

 

They sat like that for a little bit, Michael crying slightly against Luke as Luke tried to comfort him. Then Michael sat up, looking straight into his eyes and moving his hand slowly though the air. Luke frowned.

"What?"

"Sing for me," Michael replied silently. Luke flushed.

"Are you sure?"

Michael nodded eagerly and Luke blushed even darker before he opened his mouth and sang.

"I don't know where you're going but do you got room for one more troubled soul, 

I don't know where I'm going but I don't think I'm going home and I said,

I'll check in tomorrow if I don't wake up dead,

This is the road to ruin and we're starting at the end."

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song was 'Alone Together' by Fall Out Boy, if you wanted to know


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this'll probably be a short chapter but the next one is the smutty one so that'll be long! This one is just, like, an introduction to that one. Oh, and there's a chapter coming up that might be triggering, so just, please, be careful.

"How's he doin?" Niall asked from across the table. Luke looked up from his shitty fries.

"Michael? Oh, he's doing alright. He had a major freak out yesterday, and that was kinda scary, but I dealt with it." Luke responded. Ashton had left two days ago, and Luke was growing closer with Michael to fill the gap. Niall smiled wistfully at Luke, who was looking almost smug for some reason.

"Luke," he said, drawing out the syllable for as long as he could. Luke frowned slightly.

"What?"

"You're a loser."

Both of them cracked up, and Luke threw a fry at Niall, which the older boy caught and ate.

"Ew, Niall. You do not know where that fry has been," Luke scolded sarcastically. Niall flipped him off.

"You have an entire bucket of possible contaminated fries, so shut up," he teased. The two of them sat together for a while, laughing and chatting about nothing as Luke finished his fries.

"I'm gonna go check on Michael," Luke announced, standing and crumpling his fry container in his hand. Niall nodded.

"Yeah, I should probably drop in on Haz," he agreed.

"Laters, Niall."

"You are such a loser. Bye, Lucas."

 

Michael was already in their room when Luke walked in, smiling widely down at a package in his lap.

"What'd you get, Mikey?" he asked, vaguely surprised that they were allowed to get packages. He'd gotten a few letters, but never a gift.

Michael smiled up at him and tipped the box so he could see inside. There was a shirt in there, a band shirt for Iron Maiden, Luke thought, along with a little portable CD player and a couple of disks, including, yes, Fall Out Boy, and a blue bottle of something.

"What's this," Luke asked, picking up the bottle and holding it out. Michael reached up and tugged at his faded green hair while mouthing, "dye."

"Oh, it's hair dye," Luke said stupidly. Michael nodded, reaching forward and taking the bottle from Luke, placing it back in the box. He then set the box on the floor by his bed and reached over to the night table to grab his journal, the "Calum" notebook. Usually, Luke left Michael alone when he wrote, but this time he sat down beside him.

"Can- can I see what you wrote?" he asked shyly. Michael looked at him for a second and nodded slowly, handing the book to Luke. When Luke opened it, he saw that it was filled with drawings of Niall, and Harry, and Ashton, and a boy that Luke couldn't recognize, probably Calum. There were also drawing of him, and song lyrics, written in Michael's pretty script. Luke started reading them.

"All the crossed wires, just making us tired,"

"Watch me fly, I'll never get low, and I won't come down again,"

"I'll pick you up if you fall to pieces, let me be the one to save you,"

"Michael," Luke said, raising his eyes from the journal, "these are beautiful." 

"Thank you," Michael replied, aloud, and Luke could've died. Michael had the most beautiful voice that he'd ever heard, rich and full and slightly high pitched but still a man's voice. Luke could've listened to it all day. He leaned in even closer to Michael, who reached up and grabbed his face.

"Luke?"

"Yeah?" 

"I wanna- I wanna kiss you."

"Then kiss me."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for commenting on my last chapter! I'll try to have the next chapter up tonight, tomorrow at the very latest. Oh, and the songs that I used were "The Only Reason", "Superhero", and "Unpredictable", all by 5SOS


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUT AND UNDERAGE WARNING I SUPPOSE! Okay so this was awkward for me to write, seeing as I haven't written smut before, but Jesus Christ, was it fun.

Michael leaned forward, then paused, looking at Luke like he was unsure. But Luke was sure. He wrapped his hand around the back of Michael's neck and all but yanked the smaller boy towards him, pulling him close as they kissed. He could feel Michael's shyness, his slight reluctance, and he took Michael's lower lip between his teeth and tugged, ever so gently. Michael came alive at that, pressing closer, running his hands over Luke's body like he owned it. Luke gasped quietly and Michael took advantage, licking into Luke's mouth and wrapping his arms tightly around Luke's shoulders. He shifted until he was lying on his back with Luke straddling his hips, his hands slipping down to Luke's chest, fisting at his shirt. Luke pulled away from Michael, still close enough to feel the other boy's breath on his face, holding himself up with hands on either side of Michael's head. Michael smiled, his eyes mostly closed and his lips slightly swollen.

"Luke," he whined.

"Yeah?"

"Kiss me."

So Luke did, lowering himself down and fitting his mouth to Michael's, his lips moving slowly, deliberately. Michael squirmed slightly underneath him, sliding a hand down Luke's side and grabbing a handful of his shirt, pulling it up over the small of his back.

"No, you don't," Luke teased, grabbing Michael's arm and pulling it away, holding it down against the bed. He then pulled further away from Michael, putting at least half a foot of space between them. Michael arched his back, desperate to get closer, and Luke gently pushed down on his shoulder. 

"Be patient," he said, moving his hand to play with the collar of Michael's black button-down. Luke slipped his fingers down Michael's chest, undoing the buttons as he went, watching as Michael's breathing grew faster, shallower. Finally, he pulled the shirt open.

Michael was so thin.

Luke's eyes trailed hungrily over Michael's torso, examining the highly visible bones of his chest, the cavity of his stomach, the way that his hipbones strained against his milk-white skin. Worst of all were the scars on his hips and stomach. It didn't seem like anyone could live like this, let alone someone as amazing as Michael. Luke tried to push his thoughts to the back of his mind, eyes closing as he leaned back down over Michael, kissing up his tummy, stopping to suck a mark in the middle of his chest. Michael moaned and slid his hands down Luke's back, gripping his hips tightly, holding them in place as he bucked up into them. Luke's eyes flew open because, oh my god, was this really happening? Did he want it to happen? Fuck, yes he did. He grinded forcefully down onto Michael, earning a startled whimper from the smaller boy, who moved his hands to squeeze Luke's ass. Luke pulled away and sat up, his hand grabbing Michael's crotch and squeezing, eyes trained on his face. For as dirty as Michael looked right then, with Luke's hand on his dick and his shirt spread out beneath him, a large purple bite blemishing his chest, he still looked like an angel, still looked radiant and pure. He was beautiful. Michael arched his back, pressing his head down into the pillows and bucking his hips up into Luke's hand.

"L-Luke," he whimpered, "Luke,  _please._ "

Luke's face flushed and he felt his already hard dick twitch in his tight jeans. He moved his hand up slightly, popping the button of Michael's jeans and pulling the zip down. He pushed off Michael, standing to pull his jeans off of his thin legs, tugging off his own shirt while he was up. Once Michael's jeans and his shirt were lying somewhere on the floor of their room, Luke went to kneel in between Michael's open legs, sitting back on his heels and staring at the other boy's mostly naked body.

"Luke," Michael whispered, sitting up and wrapping his arms around Luke's neck. Luke reciprocated, slipping his arms around Michael's waist and pulling the thin boy flush against him so that he was seated in Luke's lap, legs on either side of Luke's hips.

"Yeah, Mikey? What do you want?" Luke asked. He already knew, but he just wanted to hear Michael say it. Michael grinded against Luke's stomach slowly, like he was begging, and Luke shook his head.

"Your words, Mikey. Tell me what you want."

Michael groaned, exhaling across Luke's bare shoulder. "I want- I want you to touch me."

Luke felt the muscles in his stomach tighten, because, oh dear Lord, that was hot. He wanted to touch Michael too. But no, he was having too much fun. "Yeah? Touch you where?"

Michael let out a frustrated whimper and closed his teeth gently around Luke's shoulder, reaching back to grab his hand. "Right here," he said, pressing Luke's palm flat against his crotch and grinding into it. Luke's eyes widened and he flushed even darker, pushing Michael gently off his still clothed lap and down onto the bed. 

"Are you sure?" he asked, partly to hear Michael's voice and partly because he really wanted to know. "How far did Michael really want to go with this? But Michael just nodded, his green hair flopping against his forehead, and so Luke hooked his fingers in the waistband of his boxers and pulled them down his skinny legs. His cock sprang up, fully hard and leaking. Luke spat once in his hand, earning an unexpected moan from Michael, before wrapping his fingers around Michael's length and stroking rhythmically. 

"Yes," Michael hisses, "fuck. Yes, Luke. Please." 

Luke's dick twitched at the sound of Michael's voice, raspy and broken and breathless. He leaned down and slowly dragged his tongue up Michael's shaft, base to tip. Luke felt Michael trembling violently at the sensation. When he reached the tip, Luke licked it thickly, with his tongue flat against it, before licking again with just the tip of his tongue, flicking it along Michael's slit.

"Fuck," Michael moaned loudly, hands fisting at the sheets near his hips. "Fuck, Luke, oh my god." 

Michael's words encouraged Luke,  and he wrapped his lips around Michael's cock, moving forward and slowly taking in more. He takes in as much as he can before pulling away, pumping Michael with his fist a few times before taking his dick in his mouth again. He fell into rhythm, his mouth following the movements of his hand as he felt Michael falling apart underneath him.

"Luke, Luke, 'm gonna-" Michael warned. Luke pulled off his cock and pumped, jerking him off rather roughly until the pale boy came in thick, shuddering pulses all over Luke's chest. Michael went completely limp in the bed, chest heaving and head lolling to the side as he tried to catch his breath. Luke leaned down, still covered in Michael's come, to kiss the other boy's hips and stomach, running his lips along the pink scars.

"Luke," Michael whispered, weakly tugging at Luke's hair.

"Yeah?" 

"Thank you."

Luke nodded against Michael's tummy, kissing it one last time before standing and wiping himself clean with a towel. He then cleaned off the small bit of come that had dripped onto Michael's thighs, handling him gently, like he was afraid that the other boy might break. When they were both clean, Luke stripped off his jeans and climbed into Michael's bed, wrapping himself around Michael's thin frame.

"Luke?" 

"Yeah?"

"I love you," Michael murmured quietly, clutching tightly at Luke's hand. Luke smiled, burying his face between Michael's shoulder blades.

"I love you too."


	9. Chapter 9

"Lukey?" Michael asked when the alarm went off. "Are you awake?" 

Luke was awake, of course. He'd been awake for hours, just watching the way Michael slept, the moonlight casting patterns on his face as it filtered through the window.

"Yeah, Mike. I'm up," he murmured. Michael shifted around in his arms, turning to face him. Luke smiled at Michael's sleepy face, the way his that his eyes just barely hung open, the perfect O that his mouth formed when he yawned. 

"You're so cute," he said, leaning forward and kissing the tip of Michael's nose. Michael flushed and pushed weakly at Luke before grabbing his shoulder and pulling him closer, cuddling into his chest.

"Love you," Michael mumbled, voice still heavy with sleep. Luke kissed his forehead and held him tighter.

"Love you, too. But we gotta get up, Mikey," Luke said. Michael groaned and swore under his breath, rolling over and flopping an arm over his eyes.

"Nooooo," he begged, "I just wanna stay in bed forever."

Luke smiled and rolled his eyes, kicking out of Michael's bed and standing. "Fine, but I have to go."

Michael looked out from under his arm to glare at Luke. "Where're you going?"

"Breakfast. You coming?" Luke offered, even though he was sure that the answer was no. Michael blanched but sat up, shifting his legs so that they hung off the edge of his bed.

"Umm, sure," he said, and damn, Luke was not expecting that. For the week and a half that he'd been here, Michael hadn't once eaten with him. He'd ducked into the cafeteria a few times to grab an apple or some water, but that was usually it. "Can I borrow a sweater?" 

"Yeah, yeah, sure."

 

Luke walked into the caf with Michael, his arm looped loosely around the other boy's hip, holding him to his side. Michael was wearing Luke's favorite Arctic Monkeys sweater, which dwarfed him in size, but he still looked really damn good in it, because, hey, he's Michael. And, if Luke thought that he was surprised when Michael agreed to come to breakfast with him, it was noting compared to the expression on Niall's face. Luke thought he was going to go into cardiac arrest. 

"Whoa, hey, Mikey,"he said, standing when Luke and Michael reached the table. "How ya doin?" 

"'M good," Michael replied softly. Niall blanched and lowered himself back down into his seat. Harry was staring at Michael incredulously, and Michael looked at Luke, frowning and shy.

"Wait," Niall said, his voice as quiet as Michael's, "what is going on here?"

"Michael said that he was good," Luke announced, pulling a seat out for Michael and ushering him into it. 

"Michael- Michael said. Michael  _spoke._ For the first time, like ever," Harry said. Michael blushed and looked down, fiddling with the hem of his- Luke's- sweater. 

"Yeah," Luke said, getting kind of annoyed with Harry and Niall. "He's still a human, Haz, he can still talk and communicate."

Harry shook his head like he was trying to clear it, curls bouncing everywhere, almost hitting Niall in the face. "Jeez, yeah, yeah, sorry. It's just, like, I haven't heard him say anything in the two months that I've been here. This is kinda new."

Michael chuckled and looked back up. "S'okay, Haz. I barely remember the sound of my own voice, anyway."

"I'm gonna grab some food," Luke announced. "S'anyone want anything?"

"Grab me an apple?" Mike asked.

"Yeah."

 

Luke returned to the table five minutes later, setting his tray down halfway between him and Michael. Michael grabbed the apple and mindlessly bit into it as he listened to what Harry was asking.

"So, why'd you do it?"

"Well," Michael started, then paused, "umm. Well, after Cal- he died, it just didn't feel like anything was worth it. It wasn't worth it to eat, or sleep, or speak, or breath. I just, kinda, shut down, I guess." Luke pulled open the plastic baggie of cutlery and took out the spoon, poking Michael with it and offering it to him. Michael frowned for a second and Luke nodded at his bowl of oatmeal, asking Michael to have some. Mike frowned again but took the spoon from Luke.

"So, like," Harry said, "umm, when did it start feeling like everything mattered again? Or why?"

"I kinda realized that I can't just be sad and fucked over all the time. I'm not gonna get anywhere like that. And I thought of all my childhood dreams and told myself that I would never achieve them if I died from starvation or never spoke to anyone. And," Michael paused, looking at Luke from the corner of his eye, "I realized that there are people worth fighting for."


	10. Chapter 10

"Well, Luke," the therapist said, "I have no idea how you did it, but you've done more to heal Michael in one day than the rest of us have in half a year."

_Well, I sucked his dick, sir,_ Luke thought, not daring to open his mouth and say anything. Instead, he just smiled and nodded, trying to play off the good-boy-who-helps-people thing so that he could go back to his room. 

"Now, we're all very grateful for what you've been doing, and we don't want to ask too much from you, but you do know that Michael's still very sick, right?" Luke nodded again, his smile flattening. "We don't know what it would do to him if you left."

The meaning of the shrink's word sank into Luke's head. "Wait, so you're saying that I have to stay here until Michael's better?"

"No, no no no, of course not. We can't keep you here any longer than we have to. But, if you'd be willing to stay longer to aid in Mr. Clifford's recovery, it would be greatly appreciated," the shrink clarified. Luke pondered this for a minute. Would he be willing to stay here, a place that he'd wanted so desperately to get out of, for Michael? Hell, yes he would. 

"I'll do it," he said, "I'll stay as long as you need me."

 

Luke ran into Michael as soon as he stepped out of the shrink's office. Michael was bounding happily down the hallway, his arms filled with every damn thing in the world. Luke saw towels, rubber gloves, Michael's portable CD player, pretty much everything.

"Luke, Luke Luke Luke," Michael chirped, "c'mon, c'mon, c'mon. Let's go!"

"Michael," Luke said as he followed him down the hallway to one of the boy's washrooms, "what the hell are you doing?"

Michael set all of his stuff on the ground and held up his bottle of blue dye triumphantly, smiling widely at Luke. "Would you like to help me?" 

In no way could Luke resist Michael's happy smile, so he nodded and reached forward for the bottle. "Of course. But I have no idea how to do this, so you'll have to tell me." Michael smiled, nodding his head eagerly and bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"Okay, so, like, you could wear gloves if you want but, like, I find it easier if I don't because I can feel what parts are still dry, but your hands'll get all blue... And there's a specific way that you're s'posed to do it, but I don't do it that way. You can just take it in your hands and rub it all over my head like shampoo," Michael said, his words tumbling over each other in his excitement.

"Okay, Mikey. I think I can do it," Luke declared, reading the label on the bottle. Michael reached down and yanked his sweater off before turning to his pile of things and bending to grab a towel. Luke reached forward, pinching Michael's bum and causing him to squeak.

"Hey!" he complained, throwing his towel, which was stained with various dye colors, over his bare shoulders. Luke smiled at Michael's chest, the mark that he'd left on the other boy, and Michael's skin flushed as Luke's eyes worked over his body.

"You're such a cutie," Luke cooed. Michael frowned and stuck his tongue out at Luke, making Luke smile even wider.

"I love you," he sang, grabbing Michael's arm and pulling his closer, running a hand up his back. Michael chuckled, wrapping his skinny arms around Luke and setting his chin on his shoulder.

"I love you," he replied, "but we need to get down to business. 'Kay, Lukey?"

Luke nodded and pulled away from Michael, taking his lip between his teeth as he uncapped the bottle of dye. "So, I just put it on my hands and, like, rub it all over your hair?"

"Yeah," Michael said, "just be careful not to get it on my forehead or ears or anything, because that sucks. But otherwise, it's pretty easy. You good, Lukey?"

Luke smiled, tipping some dye into his palm. It felt weird to him, thick and oily and just kind of gross. He rubbed it onto his other hand and reached up, tentatively sliding his blue fingers into Michael's hair. Michael closed his eyes and pushed his head up into Luke's hands as Luke started working the dye through his hair, tugging gently at the strands, occasionally putting more dye in his hands. When Michael's hair was completely blue, Luke stepped back, still keeping his hands on Michael. He studied Michael for a second, making sure that he'd done a good job, before using his grip in Michael's hair to pull him close, kissing him. Michael's eyes shot open for a second before melted into Luke's chest, mouth falling open as he ran his hands up Luke's back to his shoulders.

"Luke," he mumbled.

"Yeah?" 

"I've gotta let the dye set," he said, pulling away from Luke and chuckling. Luke narrowed his eyes for a seconds before smiling and shaking his head.

"Aww," he complained before pulling his fingers out of Michael's dye covered hair. Then he tapped a finger on Michael's nose, too quick for Michael to do anything, smearing blue on his pale face. Michael yelped, jumping away from Luke and slipping his fingers into his own hair, pulling them out blue.

"It's so on, Lucas," he challenged, leaping at Luke, who scuttled away. Michael grabbed his elbow, staining the skin blue under his fingers and yanked Luke to him, slipping his other hand under Luke's shirt and up his back.

"Mikey," Luke complained halfheartedly, "you're getting me all blue."

"Aww," Michael replied sarcastically, hooking his hand around Luke's hip. "Sucks to suck."

"Literally," Luke muttered, referencing to the night before. Michael flushed, tipping his head onto Luke's shoulder to hide his face. Luke raised his blue hand to Michael's chin, pulling it up and leaning in until their lips were almost brushing. "Kiss me."

"Gladly."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter went in so many different directions I don't even know guys. BTW, who else loved the mini dye fight? Oh, and their's still gonna be dying Michael's hair next chapter, it's a long process, but there will be some Fall Out Boy and some more making out and some wet Michael so prepare yourselves.


	11. Chapter 11

Michael kissed Luke for a few seconds before pulling back, muttering about how he had to cover his hair or it'd dry out. He grabbed a plastic shower cap from his pile of things, pulling it over his hair and adjusting it around his ears. Luke chuckled, pulling on the cap and letting it snap back to Michael's head.

"Ow," the pale boy complained, walking over to the bathroom mirror and checking his reflection. 

"You look so weird," Luke teased. Michael did look crazy, with his hair smushed up in a shower cap and blue dye smudged on his nose and chin. Michael just nodded, studying his reflection in the mirror. Luke watched as Michael's eyes trailed over his face, down his chest, eyes catching on the scars that crossed his stomach and the bones that stuck out from his ribs. He looked disgusted with himself. Luke walked over, wrapping his arms tightly around Michael's middle.

"You're beautiful," he said. Michael shook his head ad tried to shrug Luke off. 

"'M not," he insisted. 

"Yes, you are. You're beautiful. So, so beautiful."

And, with that, Michael started crying. Luke turned the pale boy in his arms so they were facing each other, pulling him close and murmuring little sounds to comfort him. Michael's skinny arms wrapped around Luke's back, holding Luke's tall frame like a lifeline and sobbing into his t-shirt. 

"Shh, shh," Luke murmured, "you're okay. It's okay."

Michael continued to cry for a few minutes before pulling away from Luke, reaching up at rub at his eyes. "Sorry, 'm sorry," he whispered. Luke just smiled and shook his head.

"S'okay, Mikey. There's nothing to be sorry about." 

Michael cast Luke a small smile, biting his lip. "Do you-" he started, then paused. Luke just watched patiently as Michael looked down to the floor, the back up at him, then back down.

"Do I what, Mike?"

"Do you really think I'm beautiful?"

Luke just stared for a second, watching as Michael shrunk into himself, anticipating Luke's answer.

"Of course I do, Michael. I think you're the most beautiful person in the world, even in that stupid plastic shower cap with dye all over your face. I wish the entire world knew what you looked like, because you'd end world violence. You're like an angel, white as snow with pretty lips and bright eyes. You're perfect." Luke closed his eyes as he spoke, because surely he'd start crying as well if he didn't. But Michael chuckled, forcing Luke to open his eyes and look at him.

"You're so sappy," Michael teased, "and my eyes are the color of, like, old, dead grass."

"Well, I love them," Luke insisted, moving his hand to grip Michael's hip, "and you love me."

"Incurably so," Michael conceded.

"Just how I like it."

 

After a few minutes of staring at each other in silence, Luke turned his attention to Michael's hair. 

"So, what do we do now?"

"Well, I have to what about an hour to wash it out, so... What do you want to do?"

Luke's cheeks flushed for a second, suppressing his thoughts as he spoke. "Do you have anything planned?"

"I've got my CD player. Fall Out Boy?" Michael suggested. Luke's face fell ever so slightly, because, damn, his thoughts.

"What is it?" Michael asked.

"Well, I was kinda hoping you wouldn't have anything so we could just make out."

"We can make out while listening to Fall Out Boy."

"Yes, Michael. Yes."

 

It was the last song on  _Save Rock and Roll,_ and Luke's lips were swollen and he had scratches all down his back and Michael's chest was mostly purple and blue from all the marks that Luke'd sucked onto his skin, and Luke stood up and said: "You be Elton John."

So, naturally, Michael replied with: "Okay."

Luke plunged right into the melody of one of his favorite songs, singing the lyrics as well as he could while Michael weaved his way through the harmonies, singing gladly, freely. Luke held out his hands, gesturing for Michael to come close before grabbing his hip and twirling him around the bathroom. The two of them laughed and danced and sang breathlessly until just before the bridge, when Michael pushed away from Luke, mouthing, "It's my time to shine." He then proceeded to grab the dye bottle from where Luke had left it on the floor, raising it to his lips like a microphone and singing.

"You are what you love, not who loves you,

In a world full of the word yes, I'm here to scream..."

"NOOOO," Luke shouted, rushing forward and grabbing Michael, lifting him off the floor and over his shoulder.

"Luke!" Michael shrieked as the song finished, "put me down!"

Luke set Michael down gently, hands wrapped around Michael's waist as the last few notes of the song died out.

"You're crazy," Michael teased.

"And you love me."

"I do."

"And I'm so gonna marry you one day."

"And you're crazy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter went in a million different direction I don't even know guys. The next chapter will be that last one in the bathroom. The song was Save Rock and Roll feat. Elton John by Fall Out Boy. Hope you liked!!!!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this ones smutty as well soz guys.

Michael stepped into the showers to wash the dye out, cringing super hard because the water was cold, and Luke stood in the bathroom and mentally yelled at himself. He was so pissed because _why the hell did he have to say that he'd marry Michael_ and  _why the hell was he so fucked up_ and  _why the hell did he even try?_ He was forced out of his hatred for himself when he heard Michael shriek from the shower.

"Mikey? S'wrong?" he asked, stepping closer to the showers. Michael just laughed.

"S'coooold," he compained, "and my boxers are getting wet."

"Take them off, then! Y'idiot."

"But, I can't," Michael replied. Luke frowned again.

"Why not?"

"You're literally, like, right there," Michael responded, causing Luke to snort.

"I've seen you naked, Mikey," Luke said, "and it's not like I'm some pervert, creeping on you in the shower. Just take them off." Luke heard Michael huff before he tossed a soaked pair of boxers over the shower curtain. They landed with a damp slap on the floor of the bathroom.

"Shit," Michael whined, causing Luke to facepalm inwardly as he asked: "what now?"

"Well, my prick is getting all cold and it's not a pleasant experience."

"Oh, for Christ's sake, Michael Clifford." 

"Can you hand me a towel?"

"Fine."

 

About five minutes later, Michael stepped out of the shower, shivering and blue-lipped, rubbing a towel over his hair. Another towel was tied tightly around his hips, barely clinging to his thin figure.

"Mikey! How was your shower?" Luke teased as he craned his neck to examine his back in the mirror. There was a blue streak going from his back to the base of his neck, along with handprints on both of his shoulder blades. Michael grumbled.

"It was fucking co-" he said, and then he stopped. Luke turned to face him, only to see a blue haired Michael with his eyes narrowed and lip between his teeth, staring at Luke with a focus.

"Mikey?" Luke asked before Michael walked forward and grabbed him, pushing him forcefully to the wall, their bare chests pressed together. Michael kissed Luke, immediately forcing his mouth open and licking into it, rubbing a hand over Luke's bare stomach.

"Do you want me?" he growled, pressing even closer as he rubbed the spot over Luke's belt.

"Yes."

Michael moved to kiss Luke's neck, and luke tipped his head to allow for more access. Then Michael turned his hand so that his fingers were pointing towards the floor, slipping then under Luke's waistband, and, dear Lord, Luke was actually about to die. The contrast of Michael's hot mouth on his neck and Mike's cool fingers on his, umm, other places would literally kill him.

"Do you want me?" Michael asked again, breathing between each word. Luke nodded frantically, his wirds having escaped him, as Michael unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them down, along with his boxers. He then pulled away for a minute, staring at Luke with a slight smirk.

"Michael, Mikey, please," Luke begged. Michael huffed quietly.

"Yeah, Luke? What do you want?" he teased. Luke's mouth fell open in exasperation.

"Don't do this," he growled. Michael grumbled quietly but complied, spitting in his hand and wrapping it around Luke's hard length, leaning to kiss Luke's shoulder.

Luke knew he was gonna die at some point in his life, but he'd be perfectly content if he did it right now. Michael was jerking him off roughly and quickly and a bit too dry and it was perfect. He slipped his hand up Michael's arm to his face, angling up and kissing him. 

"Michael, mmm, Mikey I'm gonna-" he warned. Michael opened his eyes, staring at Luke as the other boy's orgasm grew more urgent. He then dropped to his knees, still jerking Luke off, closing his eyes and opening his mouth, encouraging Luke to come on his face. That did it for Luke, his legs trembling and stomach tightening almost violently as he released all over Michael's face and neck. Michael's tongue poked out from his mouth, sweeping over his lips, catching any drops as he sat back on his heels and folded his hands in his lap, staring at Luke like he was waiting for permission to get up. Then Luke realized that he was.

"Mikey," Luke mumbled, reaching out for him. Michael stood, wrapping his arms around Luke, come still dripping from his face. Luke grabbed his shirt from the countertop, cleaning Michael up before cuddling into him, chest heaving and legs still shaking, breathing in the chemical scent of Michael's hair. Then there was a knock on the door?

"Michael? Luke?" a staff member asked, "are you two okay? What are you doing in there?"

"Umm, nothing."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapterrrrrr Michael's so submissive but dominant at the same time he's just super intense like don't even.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please please ignore any mistakes I'm writing this on my phone while watching Love, Lust, or Run

Michael shook his hair out a few times, mussing it up with his fingers before deciding that it was to his liking.

"Looks good, Mikey," Luke assured, reaching up to pull at a strand of Michael's fringe. Michael flinched, ever so slightly, but that's to be expected. He's still not completely okay. 

"Yeah?" he asks. Luke nodded and reached down, grabbing the pile of Michael's things and dropping it into Mike's arms before lifting him bridal-style and carrying him out of the bathroom.

"Luke!" Michael shrieked, "what are you doing?"

"I'm carrying you," Luke dead panned in response, "duh."

"Well, don't."

Luke huffed and stopped walking, hefting Michael up as high as he could and burying his face in his stomach. "Mikey," he whined, voice completely muffled in Michael's shirt. He nuzzled his head into Michael's tummy, feeling Michael's silent laughter.

"Fine. Carry me, man servant," Mike teased. Luke grumbled and nipped at Michael's stomach through his t shirt before continuieing down the hall towards their room.

 

Luke set Michael down in the middle of their room before slipping his arms around the boy's thin waist and pulling his close to his chest.

"Lukey," Michael whined, "it's late. 'M tired." He shook Luke off his back and reached down to yank his sweater off, tossing it in the direction of the laundry basket. Luke then reclaimed him, pulling Michael close and putting his face between the other boys sharp shoulder blades, blowing a raspberry in the middle of his back. Michael squirmed away from Luke, who grabbed his hand.

"Mikey!" he chirped happily. Michael glared sarcastically and Luke pulled him back to his chest, dragging him back and knocking him unceremoniously into his bed before stripping and dropping in beside him. Mike wriggled a bit, kicking off his jeans and dumping them on the floor before wrapping himself around Luke's figure. 

"I love you, Luke."

"I love you."

 

The next day was visiting day on floor 5B. There was one of these each month, where a patient's family and friends could come to see them. It was the only time that people in teen psych could see their family, and the entire floor was elated.

The door to Luke and Michael's room flew open at 7 o'clock as Niall sprinted in and pounced on the two, screaming "my mom's coming!" Luke shouted and pushed Niall away, knocking the Irishman onto the floor.

"Hey!" Niall complained, flailing on the floor before pushing himself up onto his elbows.

"Bloody hell's wrong with you?" Luke challenged, joking mixed with anger in his voice. Niall pouted.

"I'm excited," he whined, drawing out his syllables.

"So am I," Luke said, "but I'm not waking people up at Satan's hour in the morning."

"It's seven!" Niall complained, sitting up straighter and looking and Luke. Michael's blue head and the top of his face stuck out slightly from under the blankets as he glared at Niall and tried to fall asleep.   

"That's too early," he mumbled, pulling Luke's arm tighter around his shoulders and cuddling into his bed, his pink lips stretching open as he yawned.

"You guys are so unenthusiastic," Niall chastised before standing and leaving the room. Luke pulled Michael closer to his chest, cuddling into Michael's shoulders and kissing his back.

"He's right, Mikey," Luke admitted after a few minutes, "we should get up."  

Michael growled and flipped onto his stomach, pulling Luke down with him. Luke chuckled and pulled away. 

"Come on, Mikey boy, get up," Luke said as he kicked out of Michael's bed. He stumbled over to his suitcase and rummaged through it for a pair of clean skinny jeans. Ever so slowly he dragged his clothes on, and he could hear Michael doing the same across the room.

"Nice bum," Michael chuckled. Luke shook his head.

"Same to you," he replied, turning around and tying a flannel around his waist. Michael was wearing the Iron Maiden shirt that he'd gotten in his package. He was fiddling with the wide arm holes, frowning as he tried to pull them closer together.

"Here," Luke murmured as he untied his flannel and draped it over Michael's shoulders. Michael smiled widely and slipped his arms through the sleeves before grabbing Luke's hand.

"Let's go see our families, yeah?" 

 

When Michael and Luke stepped out into the hallway, Michael jumped immediately. He yanked away frown Luke and tore down the hall before pouncing on a middle-aged blonde woman, screaming "mom!"

The force of Michael leaping onto his mother knocked her over, and the two of them toppled to the floor, hugging and laughing. A man that Luke guessed was Michael's dad got right down with them, wrapping his arms tightly around his little family. Luke's face split into a smile as he watched, looking around the hallway to see Niall clutching a little blonde toddler and Harry buried in the arms of a boy in a striped shirt.

"Luke!" somebody called, and it was a voice that he would know anywhere. He whipped around as his mum pulled him into a hug, crying softly into his shoulder. Luke buried his face in her hair, breathing in the familiar scent of his mom. Ben and Jack were standing behind her rather awkwardly as they looked around, and Luke's heart sank slightly as he realized that his dad wasn't here. It wasn't that Luke was really expecting him to show up, but shouldn't he care that his son was in the hospital? Shouldn't he care what he did? Luke kissed his mom's forehead and pulled away, wiping tears from his eyes. He felt skinny arms wrapping around his waist, and he reached down to grab Michael's hand. He pulled Michael around to his side and draped an arm over his shoulders. 

"Blueberry boy," he whispered into  Michael's ear, quiet enough that only he could hear. Michael snickered.

"Who's this, Luke?" Liz asked, looking at Michael curiously.

"This is Michael. He's my," a dozen words flashed through Luke's head. Boyfriend. Lover. Saviour. Angel. "He's my roommate."

"Hi, Michael," Luke's mom said, extending her hand out. Michael reached out and shook it.

"Hello, Mrs. Hemmings," he replied shyly.

"Mikey," a woman asked from behind them. Luke turned around to see Michael's parents. They took a place beside their son, who was still leaning against Luke. "Is this Luke?"

Michael nodded and Luke smiled, reaching across Michael to shake his mom's hand. 

"Hello, ma'am," he said. She held onto his hand and smiled widely at him, looking at the arm that was wrapped around her son's shoulders.

Michael tipped his head up and kissed Luke's cheek. "I'm gonna go and meet Niall's nephew," he said before turning to Luke's family, "it was great meeting you." He then stepped out from under Luke's arm and walked over to Niall, who held out the toddler like he was a trophy. 

"May I steal your son for a minute?" Mrs. Clifford asked Luke's mom. Mrs. Hemmings smiled widely and nodded before kissing her son's forehead. 

"Come find me later," she instructed. Luke nodded.

"Yep, mum." He then followed Mrs. Clifford down the hallway where it was quieter.

"I just want to thank you," she said, "you've helped him so much. He's been here for 8 months, you know. And not once has he come out to see us on visiting day. But he's happier. I know it. He's speaking again, finally. He's been mute for nearly 10 months, and he's speaking again. And I know that it's because of you. He talks about you like you're the best thing in the world, and I cannot thank you enough."

"Don't thank me," Luke insisted, his voice thick with emotion. Mrs. Clifford pulled him into her arms as his tears started falling. "I just want him  to be happy."

"You saved him."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Harry's boy in the striped sort was Louis, just so you know... Please comment I'm so insecure.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who commented!!! And the next chapter (or the one after that) will likely be smutty, just so you know.

At noon, the families were instructed to go. Luke's brothers were trying to figure out a way to smuggle him out, Niall was debating locking himself in his room with his nephew and never returning, Harry and his visitor were both in tears, and Michael was clinging to his mother with everything he had in him.

"You can't go," he insisted, putting his face in his mom's neck, arms wrapped tightly around her waist.

"Aww, Mikey. I'm sorry. I have to," she replied, tucking her chin over her son's head and running a hand over his back. He shook his head stubbornly.

"But muuuum," he complained, pulling back and pouting childishly.

All of a sudden, Luke felt arms wrapping around his waist and his being lifted off the floor.

"We've got him!" his brother Jack said. Ben laughed as jack started walking towards the exit.

"Jack! What the hell?" Luke demanded, squirming in his brother's arms.

Now, a 6-foot tall man getting lifted and carried around by another 6-foot tall man must be quite a show, so almost everyone on floor 5B was watching the Hemmings boys. In a futile attempt to escape, Luke jerked his upper body forwards while kicking his legs, causing his brother to drop him. Luke fell to the floor like a sack of potatoes.

"Ow!" he cried, glaring at his brother from his spot on the ground. Jack was rubbing his leg and glaring back.

"You kicked me in the kneecap, you turd," he replied. Luke chuckled, then Jack did the same, his face contorting the exact way that Luke's did as he reached down to tug his brother off the floor.

"I love ya, Lukey," he said, pulling Luke in for a hug. Ben wrapped his arms around his brothers, and their mom came and did the same, creating a little Hemmings bundle with Luke in the centre. 

"I love you guys," he murmured, his voice slightly muffled in Jack's shirt.

Then it was last call for the families to leave and there were hugs and tears across the entire floor and Michael had dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around his mom's legs, refusing to let her go. Luke said goodbye to his family, letting his mom kiss all over his face, before watching them go.

"Mikey," he mumbled, coming up behind Michael and getting on the floor with him, wrapping his arms around the blue-haired boy. "You gotta let her go, buddy."

Michael shook his head but released his mom, shifting into a more comfortable postion and curling into Luke. His mom crouched down and cupped his cheek.

"I love you," she told him.

"I love you too," he replied, reaching up to cover her hand with his own. She kissed his forehead, leaving a smudge of pink lipstick, before standing. Michael's dad took her place, bending down to ruffle his son's bright hair.

"Love you, Mikey. See you soon," Daryl said.

"I love you too, dad. Bye," Michael murmured, waving at his parents as they left. Then he looked up at Luke, tears spilling down his cheeks as he gripped the larger boy's t shirt tightly. Luke shifted so that he was cradling Michael in his lap, nuzzling his face in Michael's hair.

"It's okay, Mikey. Everything's gonna be fine."

 

"Theo's been gone for half an hour and I already miss him like crazy," Niall said as he peeled a banana.

"That's your nephew, yeah?" Luke asked. He'd gotten around to meet   Niall's family, but he was shit with names. 

"Yeah," Niall responded, biting into his banana in the most sexual way possible. Michael grumbled and rolled his eyes. 

"Who was that guy who came to see you?" Luke asked as Harry sat down beside Niall. 

"It was, uhh, it was Louis," Haz replied, smiling broadly with a dazed look in his eyes. Luke frowned.

"Am I supposed to know who that is?" he asked. 

"Oh, ahh, sorry," Harry said, his cheeks flushing. "Lou's my, um, boyfriend."

"Ahah! Yes, Hazza!" Niall teased. Harry stuck his tongue out playfully. 

"What about you, Mikey?" Harry asked. "You practically took your mom down." 

"Ha! I did, didn't I? It's just, like, I haven't seen them in forever. I never realized how much I missed them. Now I feel like an arsehole for never going out to see them," Michael responded, ripping a peice of bread from Luke's sandwich and popping it in his mouth.

"I'm sure they understand, Mikey," Niall reassured him. "You just needed some time."

"Yeah," Michael responded with a nod. 

"Are you alright, though? You look a little sad,"Harry asked. Michael nodded again, biting his lip.

"I was just kinda hoping that Ashton might show up," he admitted, "he told me he would come."

Niall's face fell slightly as he shook his head. "He's only been gone, like, 6 days, Mike-Ro-Wave."

Michael shook his head. "Yeah, yeah, I know. He's probably busy or something. He just, he said he'd come. But oh well, I guess."

There were a few moments of awkward silence until Niall turned to Luke.

"Luke," Niall said, "your brothers were a riot. I didn't even think it was possible to lift you until they showed up."

"Don't even try it, Horan," Luke warned, "and yeah, they're the best. For as much as they piss me off, I love them."

Michael took a bit of Luke's sandwich as Niall launched into a story about how Theo had everything because he was a natural blonde, and Luke's face curved into a relaxed smile. He thought about his family, not just his biological one, but the little one he had here, sitting at this table. He knew for a fact that everything would be different if he'd never known them, and he leaned in to kiss Michael's forehead as the blue-haired boy finished off his sandwich.

"Mikey?" he whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

 

Luke and Michael pushed their beds together in the centre of the room, securing the two frames in place with duct tape.

"This is such a dumb idea," Michael teased as he flopped onto his mattress. Luke crawled onto the bed beside him, pulling Michael onto his chest.

"I think it's a great idea," he replied, skimming a hand up Michael back.

"And why is that?"

"Because I've almost fallen out of your bed so many times it's not even funny," Luke deadpanned, nipping gently at the back of Michael's neck. Michael chuckled and shifted so that he was lying flat on top of Luke, stomach to stomach.

"There's an activity tonight," he murmured, putting his face in Luke's neck. "I don't really wanna go."

"Let's just stay here, then," Luke offered sleepily, "just stay here together."

"Will you kiss me?"

"Yup."

As Luke slotted their lips together, his hand pressing down on Michael's back, he wondered how this could get any better. And when Michael dozed off like a kitten on Luke's chest, snoring softly, Luke knew that he was so gone. Luke was Michael's, and Michael was Luke's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing on mobile, please pardon any mistakes. And comment please I'm still so insecure. (Tell me a song that they should have sex to that's all that I need.)


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the smuttiest chapter I've ever written.

In the end it was Niall who was sent to retrieve Luke and Michael for the group activity. He knocked softly and walked inside, heart melting at the sight of the two boys draped over each other. He gently shook Luke's shoulder, waking the blonde boy. 

"What is it?" Luke rasped, taking care not to disturb Michael as he slept.

"Dr. Scorpo told me to come get you two," Niall replied. Luke frowned, gently lifting Michael off his chest and setting him back onto the bed. Michael stirred but didn't wake, whimpering and murmuring for Luke.

"Do you think we could just let Michael sleep?" he asked, slipping out of bed and pulling the covers up over Michael's shoulders, tucking them under his chin. He then grabbed a notepad and scrawled a quick message in case Michael woke up before he got back.

"You two are so cute," Niall commented as he and Luke left the room. Luke scrunched up his face at Niall.

"So, what're we doing?"

"Arts and crafts," Niall replied.

"Seriously? What are we? Four year olds?"

"Pretty much."

 

Michael was still curled up in their bed when Luke got back but he was now awake, breathing in the scent of one of Luke's sweaters as Arctic Monkeys played softly in the background.

"Hey, Mikey," Luke said, kicking his shoes off and crawling into bed beside him. Michael released Luke's sweater in favor of clutching Luke, nuzzling his face into Luke's shoulder.

"You left," he whined. Luke chuckled and pulled Michael closer, kissing his forehead.

"Sorry, kitten."

"S'okay." 

Luke slipped his arm tightly around Michael waist, grasping his hip tightly.

"Mmm, Mikey," he whispered, "c'mere.

Michael shifted, moving until he was on top of Luke, straddling his hips. Luke cradled the back of Mike's neck, pulling him down to kiss him. His other hand moved down Michael's back, cupping his bum and squeezing. Michael gasped, fingers digging into Luke's broad shoulders and pressing his hips against Luke's. Luke smiled and shook his head before flipping over so that he was hovering over Michael. He slipped his hands under Michael's back, lifting the boy up and using his teeth to pull Michael's shirt up his chest. Michael tugged it off completely and Luke lowered Michael back down to the mattress, bending over him and licking a stripe up his chest. Michael whimpered and pulled at the shoulders of Luke's t shirt, so Luke sat up and pulled it off, dropping it carelessly on the floor.

"L-Luke," Michael murmured, "please. I-I want..."

"You want me?" Luke asked. Michael nodded, and Luke reached across him to turn up the volume on the CD player, which was still playing Arctic Monkeys. "Sing," he commanded as he started moving his hips against Michael's.

"W-what?"

"Sing for me," Luke repeated, grinding forcefully against Michael. The blue-haired boy's mouth dropped open.

"S-she's a certified m-mind... blower," Michael sang brokenly, breathing hard. 

"Yeah, Mikey," Luke cooed, lips working over Michael's collarbones. "So pretty."

"Luke, Luke, please," Michael whimpered, nails digging into Luke's back. "I, I, God. I need you."

"Mmm," Luke hummed, kissing down Michael torso to the band of his jeans. "Keep singing."

"She c-calls the... the... mmm, I forgot," Michael mumbled. Luke laughed softly, closing his teeth gently over Michael's prominent right hipbone.

"That's okay, Mikey. You're doing great, kitten."

"Luke, please, just, please," Michael begged. "I want..."

"You want what, baby?" Luke asks, licking over the bite marks on Michael's hip.

"I want to- to feel you," Michael murmured, "I want you i-inside me."

Luke nearly chokes on his own spit, pressing his cheek to Michael's hip and letting his words sink in.

"Are- are you sure?"

Michael nodded, eyes closed and head tipped back. Luke hooked his fingers around the other boys waistband and pulled his jeans down his thighs. Then he stood to pull Mike's jeans off completely, following with his own before crawling back in between Michael's legs. Michael arched up slightly as Luke gripped the back of his thigh, mouthing at Michael's cock through the thin fabric of his boxers. 

"Luke, God, please. I- I need you." Michael whispered. Luke but his lip and nodded, slipping his fingers under the band of Michael's boxers and dragging them down Michael's legs. Michael then did the same to him and they were both naked in bed for the first time, and Luke was so nervous but he also wanted this so bad.

"Are you sure that you want this?" Luke asked again, moving up and burying his face in Michael's neck.

"Yes, Luke. I'm sure. I want- I want this. I want you," Michael insisted, squeezing Luke's shoulder.

"Have... have you ever..." Luke asked. Michael shook his head.

"No," he murmured, "but I want to. With you."

Luke smiled, reaching over Micharl to the bedside table and rummaging through the drawer before pulling out the bottle of lube that Jack had given him.

"Do you want me to prep you?" he asked Michael. The blue-haired boy nodded and bit his lip. His eyelids fluttered closed as Luke poured some lube over his fingers, kissing Michael's shoulder as he moved his hand down Michael's body, sliding his slick fingers over Michael's hole for a moment before stopping and slowly pressing one finger in. Michael tensed, his eyes squeezing shut as Luke pushed in further.

"Shh, Mikey. You have to relax, baby," Luke whispered. Michael nodded, breathing deeply, and he soon started to relax. Luke pushed his finger in all the way to the knuckle before pulling it out and thrusting it back in gently, taking care not to hurt Michael in any way. Michael grabbed Luke's face with a shaky hand, pulling him in for a kiss as Luke continued slowly moving his finger in and out of Michael.

"Luke," Michael whined against his mouth, "more. Please."

Luke pulled his finger out and thrust back in with two, and Michael hissed, the stretch painful but not unbearable.

"Tell me if you want me to stop," Luke said, heart almost breaking as Michael face contorted. He really didn't want Michael to be in pain.

"No," Michael insisted, "if you stop, I'll kill you."

Luke chuckled, curling his fingers up and hitting Michael's prostate. Michael moaned loudly, grasping the back of Luke's neck tightly. 

"Luke, God, please, I-I think I'm..." Michael rasped brokenly. Luke nodded and pulled his fingers out, wiping them carelessly on the comforter. He lubed up his cock and positioned himself over Michael before remembering the music that still played in the background. He reached over to the table and turned the music up louder. 

"Sing, Mikey," he mumbled, gently grasping his hip and pushing in. Michael's eyes widened.

"Secrets I h-have held in-n my heart," Michael stuttered, his raw, broken voice still more beautiful than anything that Luke had ever heard.

"Are harder to hide than I thought," Luke continued, slowly rocking his hips into Michael's.

"Maybe I just wanna be yours, I wanna be yours, I wanna be yours," they sang together. Michael's fingers flexed over Luke's hips, holding them tight enough to bruise.

"Harder, Luke, please," Michael begged, "fuck me."

Luke pressed both hands to Michael's chest, pulling out amost completely before thrusting forcefully. Michael arched his back and bit diwn harshly on his lip.

"Do you like that, Mikey? Like it rough? Are you gonna take it for me?" Luke asked, nipping at Michael's earlobe and pounding firmly into him.

"Touch me," Michael whimpered. Luke nodded, one hand beside Michael's head to hold himself up while the other one slid between their bodies to stroke Michael's cock.

Luke thrust into Michael at a punishing rhythm, watching as his blue-haired boy fell apart underneath him.

"Lukey, mmm, Luke, I'm gonna come," Michael mumbled, scratching down Luke's back. 

"S'okay, Mikey, okay, so am I," Luke responded, swiping his thumb over Michael's slit. Michael came with a jerk, trembling and sweating, clenching around Luke. Luke's stomach tightened as Michael's come streaked his stomach and he came too, buried deep inside Michael.

After taking a few minutes to just realize what the fuck happened, Luke pulled out of Michael and flopped onto the bed beside him, chest heaving. Michael was just lying there, sweat shining on his chest, a stupid grin plastered on his face.

"It's not gonna be weird now, is it?" Luke asked, joining hands with Michael.

"No. Maybe. Just a little bit."

"Was that alright?"

"It was perfect."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the only time I've ever written m/m sex so if it was good pls comment and if it was bad please leave any tips or advice. The songs were "No.1 Party Anthem" and "I Wanna Be Yours" by Arctic Monkeys.


	16. Chapter 16

Nobody noticed that Niall wasn't okay, not even Niall. But he didn't feel safe here anymore, not like he used to. And he was hearing things, his name being called over and over, his mother screaming, Theo crying. But he ignored it, blaming it on exhaustion and hunger. 

He looked over at Harry's empty bed and sighed. The curly haired boy had moved into Luke's old room, claiming that Niall snored too loudly. Anyway, Niall had dropped into Harry's room to say goodnight. He'd meant to say goodnight to Michael and Luke too, but he'd heard things going on in their room that he didn't particularly want to witness. He sighed once more before turning his lamp off and flipping over, closing his eyes to sleep.

"Hi, Niall," someone said, and it was a voice that Niall would recognize anywhere. His eyes slid open. She was sitting on the edge of his bed, gray eyes watching him intently.

"Hey, Sophie," he murmured, "how've you been?"

"I've been good, Niall. Do you know that Luke boy who moved onto your floor?" she asked, reaching out and stroking his cheek. 

"Yeah," Niall responded, "he's my friend."

"That's good. He's a nice boy, isn't he?" Sophie said. Niall nodded.

"But that Michael boy he always hangs around with..." she continued. Niall frowned.

"What's wrong with Mikey?"

Sophie grimaced at the nickname and pulled her hand away from Niall. "I don't like him, Niall."

"What?" he asked, "why not?"

"I just don't trust him," she replied, tugging on her blonde hair, "I really don't like him."

"Well, what do you want me to do?" Niall questioned, sitting up on his elbows. Sophie smiled gently.

"I want you to kill him."

"Okay."

 

Michael winced as he sat up the next morning, letting out a loud hiss. 

"What's up, Mikey?" Luke asked, reaching out and brushing his thumb over Michael shoulder. Michael flushed and he shook his head with embarrassment.

"My ass hurts," he admitted, entirely expecting Luke to laugh at him. Luke just bit his lip and looked at Michael sadly. 

"God, Mikey, 'm sorry," he mumbled, pulling his arms back to his chest and curling into the mattress. Michael smiled softly and lay back down next to Luke, ignoring his discomfort. 

"S'okay, Lukey," he reassured, "actually, it's more than okay. You gave me the best night of my life. A little bit of pain won't ruin that."

Luke looked at Michael through his eyelashes, blue eyes still clouded with guilt as he took in Michael's words. "Yeah?"

Michael pushed his way into Luke's arms, cuddling into the larger boy's chest and breathing in the scent of his skin. "Yeah, Lukey. Everything's okay. Nothing is wrong."

Luke smiled, tightening his arms around Michael's middle. Michael slid his arms up, elbows pressed to Luke's chest and fingertips grasping his jaw.

"I love you, Mikey," Luke murmured into Michael's blue hair. Michael let out a contented grumble, settling even closer to Luke.

"I love you," he replied.

After a few minutes, Michael tapped Luke's cheek to get his attention. 

"I'm not going to breakfast," he announced. Luke frowned.

"Why not? You have to eat, baby," Luke argued. Michael nodded.

"I know that. But my ass hurts. I'm so not going to the cafeteria like this," he retaliated. 

"So, what you're saying is that you want me to go to breakfast and bring you something?" Luke asked. Michael smiled.

"You're the best," he cooed.

"I know."

 

"Zayn? Zayn, please, I don't understand," Harry begged. Zayn dropped a plate on the table in front of Harry, chocolate eyes cold as ice.

"Fucking eat," he growled, tossing a fork at the scared 15 year old.

"Zayn, this isn't right. Please. You're overreacting," Harry pleaded, taking a small bite of the food in front of him. He didn't want any of it, but Zayn would get mad if he didn't.

"No, Harry, I'm not," Zayn spat. "I can't keep taking care of you, okay? That's not my job. It's not my fault that your parents left you or whatever, I don't have to pick up any of the pieces." 

That was a low blow, and Zayn knew it. His eyes softened, ever so slightly, as Harry's filled with tears. 

"But- but Zayn, please! I love you," Harry sobbed. Zayn but his lip and shook his head.

"And I love you, Harry, but I can't do it anymore," he murmured, standing out of his chair. He gently pressed his lips to Harry's for the last time before stalking out of the kitchen, leaving Harry in his own sadness. 

Harry looked down at his body. Why did Zayn have to leave him?

 _It's because you're disgusting, Haz,_ he told himself.  _You aren't skinny enough, or pretty enough, or good enough for someone like Zayn. Or for anyone._ He ran his fingers up his rib cage, feeling each individual bone. He was disgust, truly.

He vowed not to eat unless someone noticed.

 

He shot up out of bed, tears streaming down his cheeks as he shook uncontrollably.

"It was just a dream, he breathed, "just a bad dream. Zayn's already gone, he's gone, he's been gone for two years. You're beautiful, Haz, Louis tells you every day. Louis, that beautiful boy who kicked his bad habits for you, who loved you more than Zayn ever did. He thinks you're beautiful. Everything's okay."

 


	17. Chapter 17

Niall knew that he couldn't just kill Michael, but Sophie would leave him alone.

"Soph?" he asked the next morning when he woke up.

"Yeah?" she replied, perched daintily on the end of his bed. She reached out and patted his leg once through his blankets, smiling sweetly.

"I-I'm sorry," he said, but I can't do it."

Sophie grimaced, pulling her hand away and standing off the end of the bed, walking away from him. "Why not, Niall?"

"Because I can't just go around killing people!" he cried, thumping his arms on the mattress. She shook her head, blonde curls bouncing airily.

"Not people, Niall," she explained, "just him."

"Why, though?"

"Because I hate him, Niall," she growled, her little hands clenching into fists. "And so do you."

 

Niall was thankful that Michael hadn't showed up for breakfast, as it gave him time to plan. He'd mindlessly bitten his nails into sharp points, clicking them on the tabletop as Luke stupidly babbled away as if anyone cared.

"Hey," Sophie reprimanded, "be nice."

"Sorry," he muttered.

"Nialler?" Luke asked, "who're you talking to?"

"What? Oh, no one. Whoops," Niall laughed. He wanted to keep Sophie a secret from them.

"Kay," Luke said, grabbing a breakfast sandwich for Michael and nodding once at Niall before he left. 

"You have to be more careful, Niall," Sophie scolded, "I don't want them to know about me.

"Sorry," he repeated, in his head this time.

 

Luke stepped into the pshych's office after breakfast. He was expecting him to say that Luke would be cleared to leave as a patient next week and start working as a volunteer, but the doctor's expression was grave.

"Sit down, Luke," he said, nodding to the chair in front of his desk. Luke sat hesitantly.

"So, am I clear to go next week?" he asked, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.

"No, Luke, I'm sorry," Dr. Scorpo said. Luke frowned, shifting so that his fingers could dig into his thighs.

"But that's- that's not fair! You said that I was here for a month!" Luke argued, eyebrows drawn together tightly. The doctor sighed tiredly.

"You really don't know what's wrong, do you?" the man asked, "you really don't remember." Luke shook his head.

"Two months ago, you were diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. So we've been watching you very closely, checking for patterns in your mood, monitoring how it changes. Luke, your behaviour changes like the wind. You went from hating this place to offering to stay to falling in love with one of the other patients. There's no rhyme or reason. And, because borderline personality disorder can lead to suicidal thoughts or actions, it simply isn't safe to discharge you. I'm sorry."

Tears were streaming down Luke's face as he pushed out of his chair and left the office. He really wasn't as normal as he thought. He all but sprinted back to his room, tears blurring his vision. Once in his dorm, he walked straight to the wall farthest from the door and slammed his fists into his. Michael woke with a startled cry, jerking up into a sitting position.

"Lukey? What's wrong?" he asked, frowning at Luke's hunched figure on the wall.

"What isn't?" Luke replied, sliding down to the floor and curling up there. Michael kicked out of bed and walked over, dropping to the floor beside Luke and pulling him between his legs.

"Luke, baby, what's going on?" he whispered into the curve of Luke's shoulder. Luke squeezed Michael's hand.

"It's nothing, really."

Michael grumbled, kissing the top of Luke's shoulder. "Luke. Please. You helped me pick up my broken pieces, just let me do the same for you."

Luke's heart swelled when Michael said that, and he cuddled into his pale chest. "It's just that I'm not as normal as I thought I was."

Michael chuckled. "None of us are, Lukey. That doesn't mean we're any less human."

"Mikey?"

"Yeah?"

"I really love you."

"And I love you too, with everything that I am."

 

Niall's eyes were dark, almost black, settled on Michael's thin frame as he walked into group therapy in the afternoon. He and Harry sat down on the floor with Luke and Michael, just like always, but Niall's tension was almost suffocating, making conversation impossible. He was studying Michael, examining the weak spots in his throat, the places where his blood flowed just under his skin. Michael shuffled even closer to Luke, almost hiding behind his broad shoulders, wide, frightened eyes trained on Niall. Luke cleared his throat.

"Umm, Nialler?" he asked, snapping his fingers in front of the Irishman's face. "You okay, bro?"

Niall snapped out of his thoughts, jumping back into the situation. "Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm great," he replied. Michael awkwardly stood, stumbling over to one of the doctors to ask if there was anything that he could to, desperate to escape the tension. 

"Now," Sophie murmured, "you can go now. No one's watching, and he's got his back to you." 

Niall looked around at Luke and Harry, who were deep in conversation. Then he looked at Michael, who was sharpening a pencil in the corner, his back to the room. It was the perfect opportunity. Before anyone could stop him, he was up, with Michael pressed between him and the wall.  His hands were wrapped firmly around Michael's throat and his fingernails dug into his jugular, blpod spurting out with each beat of Michael's heart.

"Niall," Michael mouthed, eyes wide and face red. Niall used his grip on Michael's throat to lift him off the ground.

"Niall, stop!" Luke shouted, grabbing his bicep and trying to yank him away, Niall grunted and shook the blonde-haired boy off, pride building in his stomach as Michael's eyes started to dim.

And then security was on him, a needle being inserted into the juncture of his neck and shoulder, and Michael fell to the ground like a rag doll. Luke immediately crouched beside him, ripping off a piece of his own t shirt and pressing it to the side of Michael's neck, where blood was slowly leaking out of four crescent-shaped cuts. 

Everything went hazy for Niall, who fell into the arms of a security guard and took in the scene before him. Michael was slumped on the ground with his eyes shut, Harry and Luke on either side of him, tending to his injuries.

"Whoa," Niall slurred drunkenly, "what happened to Mikey?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is a kind of weird ass chapter but I kinda like it... Please please comment I love reading them \\(•_•\\)  
> Love,   
> -Vi


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's all downhill from here. And I haven't updated I'm forever, I'm a bitch, sorry! Here's the chapter.  
> \- Vi

Michael woke to a dull, throbbing burn in his neck and a teary-eyed Luke perched on the end of their bed, Michael's feet in his lap. Michael open his mouth to ask Luke what was wrong, but the blonde boy immediately reached over him, clapping a hand over his mouth.

"Shh, Mikey. Don't talk, 'kay? You feeling alright?" Luke asked. Michael frowned but nodded nonetheless, shaking Luke's hand off this face. 

"D'you know what happened?" Luke continued. Michael raised an eyebrow and cocked his head to the side. Luke sighed as Michael sat up, cuddling into the blonde's broad chest. 

"Well, uh," Luke started, "Niall went a little crazy, if that's the right word. Anyway, his freaked out, attacked you, possibly tried to kill you."

Michael let out a broken gasp at Luke's words, reaching up and ghosting his fingers over the pain in his throat. Sure enough, there were bandages plastered to his skin, four, if he counted correctly.

"Why?" he mouthed, leaning away from Luke so the other boy could see. Luke shook his head.

"I don't know, Mikey," he replied, reaching up to stroke Michael's blue hair. "Needless to say, Nialler's not on the floor anymore."

Michael frowned again. "Where is he?"

"I don't know that either. He's either moving to the bigger hospital in Melbourne or going to the intensive care floor. But he's fine, mostly."

Michael nodded again, absently reaching up to his throat again. He recoiled as his hand brushed one of the finger-shaped bruises. Shaking his head, Luke grabbed at Michael's hand, pulling it to himself and kissing it. 

"Just relax, Michael," he murmured, shifting around until he was lying on his back with Michael pressed to his chest. "Everything's okay."

 

Harry curled his legs up underneath him daintily, loving the way that Louis' black sweater covered his boxer briefs, painting his skin even lighter than usual. He took a drag from the joint that dangled lazily from between his fingers, smiling as Louis watched his lips. He formed an exaggerated 'O' with his mouth as he exhaled, smoke clouding his sharp features.

"D'you want some?" he teased, holding the joint out to Louis before pulling back to himself. Louis smirked and nodded, looping his arms around Harry's thin waist. 

"C'mere," Harry murmured, taking another drag. He held it until Louis leaned in close to him before exhaling, blowing smoke over his boyfriend's cheek.

"D'you want some?" he asked again, not waiting for an answer as he breathed in more smoke, taking Louis' face in his free hand and tipping his mouth open with his thumb. He exhaled directly into Louis' mouth, eyes open, watxhing the smoke float up, clouding Louis features.

"Last time," he said, taking another drag and finally pressing his lip to Louis'. The gaps between their lips allowed the smoke to filter out, framing both of their faces, stinging Harry's open eyes.

It was their last moment of peace.

Harry could hear glass breaking, and grown men shouting. He could hear himself crying, and Louis murmuring quietly to try and calm him down. And he could hear himself screaming as two pairs of hands wrapped around his arms, dragging him forcibly away from Louis. The joint that they'd been smoking fell to the ground, forgotten.

"Harry!" Louis shouted as he jumped to his feet, only to get grabbed by another two men. Harry couldn't breathe, couldn't think, as scared broken sobs ripped from his chest. no more than two feet away from him, Louis was bargaining with the police.

"Please, please, just let him go. He's scared! Please, just let him go. Don't hurt him." 

The officers talked for a minute before releaseing Harry. The curly-haired boy stumbled, nearly falling, before lurching over to Louis and wrapping his arms tightly around his still-restrained boyfriend.

"Please," he whimpered into Louis's chest, "please don't take him away from me." 

\--------------------------

Harry woke with a start, gripping the sheets of his bed tightly in his white-knuckled hands. There was a small note on his bedside table and he reached to open it, revealing Louis neat, straight writing inside.

_Hazza,_

_Love you. Have a good day, babe._

_-Lou xx_


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I SUCK!!!! It's been so long since my last update I'm so sorry. And this chapter should be really long for me but I'm just trying to bring the word count up so yeah, enjoy! I went through so many emotions writing this too I don't think you understand.
> 
> MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING AS WELL. PLEASE BE SAFE WHEN READING, KNOW YOUR LIMITS, I NEVER WANTED TO MAKE ANYONE SAD.

"Mount me."

"Umm, excuse me?"

"Mount me."

"I can't  _believe_ you just said that," Michael laughed.  

"No! Not like that, perv," Luke replied. He bent down in front of Michael, flailing his hands towards his back, gesturing for Michael to climb on. Michael sighed sarcastically but Luke heard the bed creak and felt Michael's hands on his shoulders before the pale boy pulled himself up onto Luke's back. Luke grabbed the backs of Michael's thighs and started out of the room in long strides, stopping momentarily to kick the door shut behind him. 

"Lewi! Mikey!" Harry said as he stepped out of his room. Luke smiled at him as he took in the sight of the two of them, Michael's legs wrapped tightly around Luke's waist and Luke's hand nearly grasping Michael's arse. Harry sighed.

"If I get diabetes from you two I'm sending you my medical bills," he warned sarcastically. Luke pouted and Michael laughed, ducking his head into Luke's shoulder.

"What do you think the meeting'll be about?" Luke asked as they continued down the hallway. Harry shrugged.

"I dunno," he replied, "probably like a safety announcement. Might have something to do with, uhh," he trailed off, looking at Michael, or, more specifically, Michael's neck.

The bruises on Michael's neck weren't black anymore, but they were still an angry purple, and he still had bandages plastered over the nail marks. He'd gotten his speech back, though it was still hoarse, but it meant that things weren't as bad as they could've been.

"Yeah," Luke murmured. Michael kissed his shoulder. 

"I'm fine, Haz," he said, eying the worry on Harry's face. "You're gonna go grey prematurely if you don't stop worrying, he tease. 

Harry laughed but Luke frowned.

"Are you sure you're alright, Mikey?" he asked for the millionth time. Michael grumbled in his ear and kissed his cheek, causing Harry to laugh.

"When did you two get so gay?" He teased.

"When did you?" Luke shot back. Harry shrugged.

"I dunno," he replied, and then they were entering the gym and had to shut up. Luke let Michael slide off his back, immediately grabbing his hand and sitting next to him on the floor. They sat for a few minutes, whispering quietly while they waited for the rest of the patients to get here. 

After a few minutes, everyone had gotten to the gym and sat on the floor, just like Michael and Luke. Soon after, Dr. Scorpo walked in. Luke frowned at the expression on the man's face. He looked sad, or tired, maybe a little angry. Luke instictively held Michael tighter, resting his chin on the top of Michael's head.

"Good morning, everyone," the doctor said, "I have some very important news to tell you all. I'm sure all of you were familiar with Ashton Irwin, yes?" there were nods all around. "Well, I'm sorry to have to inform you that- excuse me- that Mr. Irwin has died."

And then everything collapsed. Luke felt himself spring to his feet, exiting the gym faster than he ever thought he could move. He braced himself against the wall across from the doors, dry heaving towards the floor. He felt like he was about to die. He felt like he was about to spontaneously combust. This couldn't be happening. 

After a few moments of heaving and sobbing in the hallway, he forced himself back into the gym. It was in various stages of crumbling. Nobody seemed okay. Ash had touched so many people and now he was gone, cold and dead, nothing more than a memory. 

Luke scanned the gym until his eyes settled on Michael, who was curled up in a ball. His mouth was wide open. He was screaming, Luke realized, to dazed to actually hear the noise. He stumbled over, sitting on the ground behind Michael and pulling him into his chest. He needed to hold something, needed to feel anchored, and he was pretty sure that Michael needed to be held. The doctor was still standing at the front of the room, watching everything with silent tears on his face. Finally his eyes settled on Michael and Luke and he walkEd over to them. Luke sits up, pulling Michael with him. Michael buried his face in Luke's shirt and kept screaming.

"Is he alright?" the doctor asked Luke. Luke nodded. He was pretty sure that Michael was fine, that the blue-haired boy just needed to scream and cry for a bit in order to get over it.

"How'd- how did Ashton die?" Luke asked tentatively. The doctor frowned.

"He hung himself on his ceiling fan," he said after a minute. Michael gave up on screaming and started to sob into Luke's shirt. Luke remembered his conversation with Niall, all those weeks ago. That was how Michael had tried to kill himself. He clutched the blue haired boy even tighter. 

"Shh, shh, it's alright," he murmured. Michael cried even harder and Luke suddenly felt like an idiot. Ashton had always said that when Michael was upset. And now he was gone.

They'd never get him back.

 

Everything was dead silent now that Ashton was dead. No one spoke in the hallways, not a sound could be heard. It was like everyone on teen psych had died to.

Maybe that why Luke's scream echoed so loudly through the halls.

 

Michael just wanted to be dead. Everyone he loved was dead, why not him, too? Ashton was gone, Calum was gone.

In the back of his mind Michael thought about Luke, about how Luke  might be sad if he died. Then he started convincing himself that Luke wouldn't care, that Luke would be glad that he didn't have to worry about pretending to love him anymore. Luke wanted Michael to die just as much as Michael did. 

So Michael set to work. 

He stood in the centre of his room, spinning in a slow circle, taking it in for what he hoped would be the last time. Then he stepped towards the bed, grabbing a fistful of Luke's sheets and holding them to his face for a few seconds. Finally, he fished his stupid therapy notebook out of his drawer. He flicked through the pages, where he'd already crossed out his drawings of Calum and Ashton. Slowly, he dragged his pen over the few drawings he'd done of himself, deleting them just like he'd done to Ash and Cal. He flipped to the back page, where he'd written a bunch of dates.

_September 12, 2014; The day Calum died._

_August 27, 2015; The day Ashton died._

_August 28, 2015; The day Michael died._

Satisfied, he closed his notebook, setting it back in the drawer. Then he grabbed the table lamp, throwing it against the mirror beside the bureau and watching as the glass shattered, just like he'd planned. He walked over to grab a shard, holding it delicately between his forefinger and his thumb, and moved to sit in the corner furthest from the door. 

The he set to work. 

It wasn't a process that Michael was familiar with, cutting. Ashton did it. Michael used to run his fingers over the scars on his friend's wrist, and say without words that he understood. And Calum used to do it all the time, he remembered. Michael used to step into the shower with the dark-haired boy and rinse the blood from his skin when he'd lost the will to do it himself. 

Michael had been more or less normal before he met Calum. And he tried not to blame the dead boy for what happened, but the harder he tried, the harder it was. He knew that Calum was fighting something, though, and he'd still gotten involved, still given Calum the power to destroy him. So, most of all, he blamed himself; he hated himself for getting so attached. 

And he hated himself for still loving Calum so much.

He watched his blood flow from the slits on his wrists, and decided that he wasn't gonna stop until he was dead.

 

Michael felt something warm and strong pushing on his chest, like a hand. He wanted to know who it was. His eyes were heavy, so heavy, but he forced them open anyway.

"Hey, Michael," said the person in front of him. It was someone that Michael would know anywhere. The familiar ebony haired boy was perched on the balls of his feet, face just a few inches from Michael. He felt himself smile.

"Calum," he whispered. 

"Right here, baby. You're doing great. Just come on with me, love. Everything's gonna be better."

Michael listened, his eyes dropping closed. Vaguely, he heard someone scream, but he didn't care anymore. He had Calum.

 

The first thing Luke noticed when he got to his room that night was the fact that the mirror was broken. Them he saw Michael.

His boyfriend was lying on the floor, blood pooling around him  from the cuts littered all over his arms and legs. One of the glass shards from the mirror was clutched loosely in his hand, and for a minute, Luke thought that he was dead. He rushed over, pressing his hand desperately to Michael chest, trying to feel if he's breathing or not. Michael's eyes fluttered open for a minute and he smiled. 

"Calum," he murmured before letting his eyes drop shut again, and that's it, Luke was certain that he was dead. The sound that ripped from Luke's throat is like nothing he's ever heard before, loud and scared, not human sounding. And once he started screaming, he didn't stop. Not when security came in and found him on the floor, not when the paramedics came to take Michael away, not when Harry folded Luke's shaking figure into his arms and held him. All that he could think was that Harry wasn't Michael, and he really wanted to be held by Michael right now, and that he may never hold Michael again. 

Michael could be dead too.

 

Luke spent the night in Harry's room. The smell of the disinfectant that the janitor used to clean the blood off the floor was too potent, the smell of Michael on the bedsheets was too strong. Luke just couldn't handle that. 

He refused to get out of bed in the morning, not without hearing about Michael. Luke needed to know that the blue haired boy was okay. And he needed time to think, as well.

 _Why Calum?_ He asked himself,  _Why did he talk about Calum? Couldn't he see me? Doesn't he know me?_

Luke was trying not to stress himself out too much about what Michael had said, but it was hard. He was confused, definitely, maybe a little hurt too. He just wanted some answers.

 

At noon when a nurse came to knock on his door, Luke immediately ran to answer it. He was hoping for some news about Michael. 

"Luke?" the nurse asked. Luke nodded and the nurse smiled. "We have some news on your friend. He's stable, he should be okay. But I heard from Doctor Scorpo that he and you have are close, and I was hoping that you'd be able to help us."

Luke frowned. "What?"

"We can see to his injuries and immediate mental health issues, but we can't fix his mind and heart as well as a friend can. I just need you to help make sure that he's getting over everything okay. Can you do that?"

"Yeah," Luke said, "but, umm, can I see him?"

The nurse smiled and nodded at him. "Of course. Follow me."

Luke followed the woman as she walked down the hall and down the stairs to the first floor. This was the emergency floor, if Luke remembered correctly. He walked past a bunch of small, curtained-off cubicles until he reached one about halfway down the hall. The nurse held the curtain back for him abs be stepped through.

It was better than he'd been expecting. Still bad, but better.

Michael was lying in a hospital bed, skin painted whiter than usual, with bandages plastered on his arms and the left side of his chest. Luke suppressed the urge to sob at that; Michael had really destroyed himself. He stepped forward, feeling Michael's green eyes watching his every move. Reaching forward tentatively, he brushed his fingers over the cool skin of Michael's hand. Michael tensed when Luke touched him so Luke didn't try again, instead just stepping a little closer to the edge of the bed. 

"Hey, Mikey," Luke whispered. Michael's eyes just widened slightly as he looked towards Luke but not really at him, almost through him. 

"Please," Luke begged softly, "please say something." Michael just flinched, biting his lip. Luke felt tears well up in his eyes.

"Please, Michael. I," Luke whimpered, "I love you. So much."

Tears in Michael's eyes mirrored those in Luke's and he didn't say it back, instead just shaking his head and looking away. That was when Luke knew.

Luke knew that he'd lost him. 

 

He was too weak to scream. Instead he just sat on the floor of his room, silent, as motionless as Ashton's cold, dead body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment if you liked it, I love reading them.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smuttiest chapter yet guys prepare for the D.

There was something particularly painful about breaking up with someone, especially when niether of you had actually acknowledged it. Michael only came back to their room to sleep and change, and Luke spent dozens of sleepless nights in the library, holding a book in his lap but never reading it. They were like two magnets repelling each other, and the worst part is that Michael seemed fine while Luke was crumbling. 

"Luke," Dr. Scorpo said softly, "you gotta tell me what's happening." Luke just sucked in his cheeks and shrugged. He wasn't trying to be difficult, it just hurt. Talking was like rubbing salt in his wounds.

"I've noticed that Michael stopped talking," Dr. Scorpo tried again, "did something happen between you two?"

Luke shrugged again. The doctor sighed. 

"Luke, you need to stop being difficult, okay? Because that's just making it harder for us to treat you. You can't leave until you've at least responded to some kind of treatment."

Luke just continued to stare blankly, and the doctor looked like he was on the verge of slapping him, but instead he just sighed again.

"Alright, you can go."

Luke nodded and stood to go. When he was halfway out the door, he changed his mind and turned around to address Dr. Scorpo. "Umm, Michael's also- uhh- he stopped eating. Maybe, like, watch that?"

"Luke," the doctor asked softly, slowly, like he didn't want to alarm Luke. "What happened between you two?"

And, with that, Luke was crumbling, his eyes instantly tearing up and his body trembling, and he allowed himself to get tugged gently into the doctor's office and seated in one of the crappy chairs, wrapped in itchy throw blankets, and he cried until he was ready to face everything.

 

"Hey, Mikey," Luke said halfheartedly as he entered their room. He already knew that Michael wouldn't respond. It seemed like his words just bounced off Michael's frail shoulders and he didn't even look up, completely ignoring Luke's existence. It hurt, like it always did, just an dull, relentless pounding in his chest, an empty black hole where his heart ussd to be. Michael didn't spare him a glance as he left the room. 

 

It was four a.m. when Luke headed back to his room from the library, after the woman who worked there looked at him pityingly and told him that he needed to get some rest. 

"Michael?" He asked futilely as he entered the room. He didn't know why he kept asking. Michael never responded. 

Michael was perched daintily on his dresser, legs folded up into his chest. He looked up at Luke, surprisingly, his eyes following the blond as he trudged slowly to his bed. (AN: they now have two separate beds, kk? Cause like, they broke up, so they untaped them.) Luke expected it to end there, expected Michael to go back to whatever he was doing, ending any possible interaction. Instead, he slowly slipped to the ground and walked towards where Luke was seated up against his headboard, his legs straight out in front of him. 

"Hey, Mikey," he mumbled to his lap. He felt Michael's small, soft hands on his shoulders and nearly had a heart attack. It was the first time that Michael had touched him in three weeks. Then Michael climbed into his lap, his knees bracketing Luke's hips, staring straight into Luke's blue eyes with his bright green ones. Luke's eues shot wide open and his jaw hung slack as Michael pressed his lips to his shoulder, up his neck to his jaw.

"Michael? Wh-what're you doing?" Luke stuttered, his hands instinctively coming up to cup Michael's hips. Michael didn't answer, instead sucking gently at a spot on Luke's neck. Luke knew something was wrong. He knew that he was probably getting taken advantage of, but he didn't care. He wanted, needed, to feel close to someone, to feel loved and intimate, no matter how. And, if Michael was taking advantage of him, he'd take advantage right back. 

"Strip," he growled, shoving Michael roughly of his lap. There was no love in his voice, only lust and anger, and Michael looked vaguely surprised and he slowly removed his jeans and t-shirt.

"Your pants, too," Luke commanded, nodding at Michael's black boxer-briefs. Michael ducked his head but complied, grabbing his waistband and tugging his underwear slowly down his legs as Luke watched. Luke grabbed him when he was done, his hands kneading and squeezing the sensitive flesh of Michael's ass as he pulled him down onto the bed. He pushed Michael onto his back and got up, stripping down to his pants and fishing through his bedside table for lube. His fingers brushed against a black bandana and he debated tying Michael to his headboard, but he left it. He wanted Michael to be able to touch him, wanted to be touched.

Michael just watched him with wide, green eyes, idly touching himself. Luke growled at him, roughly grabbing his wrist and yanking it away. Michael whimpered, his free hand curled into the sheets while his othe one hung limp in Luke's grip.

"D'you want me to touch you?" Luke asked, tossing the bottle of lube on the bed. He nudged Michael's leg apart even wider and climbed in between them. Michael nodded timidly, biting his lip and watching as Luke bowed down, pressing a kiss to the inside of Michael's thigh.

"Be a good boy for me," Luke said, sliding his lips up over Michael's hip, to where the head of his cock rested against his pale belly. "Are you gonna be a good boy?"

Michael whined and nodded, his fingers gripped tightly in his own blond fringe. Luke chuckled, pressing a soft, teasing kiss to the tip of Michael's achingly hard cock.

"Good choice, kitten," Luke hummed. He wrapped his hand around the base of Michael's cock roughly, probably too hard, causing Michael to cry out. Luke took Michael's cock in his mouth, going as far down as he could. He handled Michael roughly, one hand squeezing his hip, his teeth gently, somewhat cruelly, scraping the underside of Michael's dick. Michael shuddered violently, nearly screaming and yanking relentlessly at his hair, his back arching off the bed. Luke pulled off his cock and smirked up at him. He pressed a kiss to Michael's tummy before moving back up his body, nipping at his prominent collar bones.

"D'you want me to fuck you?" Luke murmured into the side of Michael's neck. Michael nodded, turnjng his face into the pillows and exposing his pale throat to Luke, who swept his tongue over his skin, tasting him. Then he crawled off the bed and yanked his shirt off. Michael watched, his lower lip clamped between his teeth.

"On your front," Luke demanded. He heard the rustle of sheets behind him as Michael turned over, followed by a quiet moan. Luke turned around to face him. He was lying on his chest with his arms folded under him, his fingers gripped loosely in the sheets. His head was turned to the right, eyes closed, and his knees were bent ever so slightly so that his arse was in the air.

Luke settled back onto the bed in his knees, grabbing Michael's ass and squeezing. Michael moaned and gripped the sheets even tighter.

"You're such a slut, Mikey," Luke said. Michael whined and nodded, flexing his back and pressing his butt up into Luke's hand. Luke rubbed over Michael's butt cheek for a minute before pulling his hand back and smacking him. Michael shrieked and Luke did it again, until Michael's pale skin was covered in red handprints. Michael was whining loudly and rolling his hips forward, his body begging to be touched. Luke peppered kisses over the emflamed skin of Michael's arse as he fished in the sheets for the lube, grabbing it and spilling some over his fingers.

"You ready?" Luke asked. Michael nodded, flexing his back even more so that his abdomen was completely off the bed, his ass pressed firmly against Luke.

Luke rubbed his fingers over Michael's hole for a moment before slipping two in. Michael hissed at the stretch and Luke slowed but didn't stop, pushing his fingers into the knuckles and pulling them out again. Michael whimpered as Luke fucked him with his fingers, quickly adding a third, giving Michael no time to adjust because he wanted Michael to feel it, to just whine and take what Luke was giving him.

He pulled his fingers out after a while, when Michael was rocking back into him and softly begging for release. He grabbed Michael's hips and flipped him roughly. Michael's eyes slipped open, watching as Luke studied him, the pink flush of his skin, the red marks where Luke's fingers grabbed his hips, his painfully hard cock which rested against his belly.

"You wanna come, don't you, baby?" Luke murmured. Michael bucked his hips up and whimpered, causing Luke to smirk. "Beg for it."

Michael blanched, uncomfortable with talking although he'd muttered a few soft phrases earlier in the night.

"Please, Luke, please. I-I need to.. God, I'm such a slut, I need to come. Fuck me, ahh, fuck me please, I need to come. I wanna come with you inside me, Luke, please, I need you."

"Good boy," Luke said. He yanked his boxers off. He grabbed his own hard cock, clearing his throat so he knew that Michael was watching, jerking it hard and fast, smearing precome over the shaft. Michael was trembling, eyes blown wide as he watched Luke for just a moment. Then Luke was grabbing his hips and lifting them, and Michael's mouth was falling open as his eyes slid shut. Luke pushed in to Michael's tight hole, dry save for his precome and the lube in  Michael's ass. Michael gritted his teeth, his muscles clenching erratically around Luke as he struggled to adjust to the intrusion. Luke bit at Michael's shoulders and collar bones, moving slowly. Tears burned in Michael's eyes but Luke pressed on, moving until Michael's muscles started to give in to him. Luke picked up speed and force, thrusting roughly into Michael until the bed was rocking into the wall, hitting it with a loud bang each time.

Michael was downright sobbing under Luke, and Luke noticed but didn't really care as his lips and hands travelled Michael's frail body, scratching and squeezing and marking his skin. He pounded into Michael's prostate and Michael threw his head back and came with a loud cry. Luke didn't stop, didn't even slow his pace, wanting to see how far he could push Michael, how much he could stimulate him until Michael couldn't keep going anymore. Luke was scraping his teeth over Michael's arms, biting into him over and over, leaving his arms battered and bloody.

"Luke," he heard above him, a soft, pained word causing him to still immediately. "Luke, stop, please, you're hurting me. 

Luke's head shot up, looking Michael in the face. Tear tracks stained his cheeks and his lip had been bitten bloody by one of them, Luke wasn't sure who. He was in pain, that was obvious. Luke had caused him pain. Luke shook his head, delicately pulling out of Michaen and cringing when he heard Michael whimper. He shuffled down the bed a bit, away from where Michael was painstakingly pulling himself up into a sitting position and drawing his knees into his chest. 

"Should I get a doctor? How bad- how badly did I hurt you?" Luke asked after a few minutes of silence, reaching for Michael's bloody arm. Michael pulled it away, tucking it into his chest and shaking his head.

"No. You're gonna get in trouble."

"I don't care, Michael. I don't care about myself. Are you sure you're okay?" Michael nodded again, and Luke reached out to gently grasp his ankles and straighten his legs. He took in the sight of Michael's battered body. His pale skin was littered with finger-shaped bruises, teeth marks and scratches, and Luke's heart sunk even deeper. Michael crossed his arms over his stomach and hung his head. "Michael, oh my god, I'm so sorry," Luke whispered again. "I never meant- I didn't want- I didn't wanna hurt you. I told myself I never would. But I did, and I don't know why. Maybe it was to claim you, I don't know. I think I was trying to get you to feel something again, to prove that I needed you, loved you. But I hurt you, and that's no way to prove that you love someone."

"It's okay, Luke."

"But it's not!" Luke insisted. "It's really not." Michael's lower lip trembled and Luke hesitantly wrapped his arms around the other boy's waist, pulling him between his long legs.

"It's okay, Luke. Really. Nothing can't be solved," Michael murmured. Luke could hear from the slight tremble in Michael's voice that he didn't really believe himself, that he was trying so hard to. Tears welled up and spilled from Luke's eyes, and he didn't even try to stop them. Michael wrapped himself even tighter around Luke, forgetting everything; his nakedness, his fear, his sadness. All he could remember was how much he loved Luke, the breaking boy beneath him. "There's nothing that can't be fixed," he repeated.

"Even us?"

"Even us, Luke. We can fix this."

"But- but I'm crazy. We're crazy."

"We can fix that too, we can fight it. And if it tries to take you, I won't let go." Michael shifted onto his knees as he spoke, looking directly at Luke. Luke stared up at him and all he could think about was how much he loved the boy before him. He ran his fingers lightly up Michael's pale thighs, ghosting over the bruises, and he wished so much that he could erase them. He continued, tracing Michael's soft stomach, wanting to touch him as much as he could tonight in case everything fell apart tomorrow. Michael just looked down at Luke, following the movements of his blue eyes as they memorized his body, trying to fight the embarrassment and shame building up in his stomach.

"Luke," he murmured softly, reaching down and grabbing Luke's hands. Luke froze, staring directly at Michael's chest.

"Fuck," he said, immediately retracting him hands from Michael's body. "Fuck, I'm so sorry. Mikey, I"

"Shh, no, it's okay. I'm okay," he replied, gently taking Luke's hands back and, albeit tentatively, setting them on his own hips. "You can keep touching."

"I thought- I thought you wanted me to stop," Luke whispered.

"I don't."

Luke nodded. His hands moved from Michael's hips to the dip of his waist to the bottom of his rib cage and then around to his back. His head was ducked, like he was worshipping, and he touched Michael so gently, so delicately, little more than a flutter of hands against his skin. Michael bit his lip and raised his hands, setting them on Luke's shoulders. Luke stopped moving, laying his cheek against Michael's stomach and resting there, using his hands around Michael's back to hold him close. Michael closed his eyes and gently worked his fingers through Luke's hair, and they could've stayed like that for minutes or hours before they fell asleep in Luke's bed, curled around each other, neither with any intent of going anywhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS I FINALLY UPDATED COMMENT IF YOURE STILL WITH ME IM LITERAL SHIT I LOVE YOU ALL

**Author's Note:**

> I put Niall's purgatory line in ther cause I'm wearing a Purgatory, Colorado sweatshirt and I'm so proud rn


End file.
